You are Awesome.

I love it! Comment my poem please its titled unspoken world...TeenInk.com/raw/Poetry/article/70405/Unspoken-World/ judging on the way you expressed yourself through this poem I am sure you'll enjoy mine!

i abosolutly love this poem! i think the picture it paints it absolutly true! we do not live in a perfect world. and i think everyone at one point or another wants to breakaway. i love this poem. definetly now one of my favorites. :) keep writing because you rock.

This is amazing! You're an awesome writer. Hope you win.

TAKE ME WITH YOU!...... You R a great writer! Keep writeing!

I understand the world is not perfect, but the way the poem talks about running away from life makes it sound suicidal. Suicide is not the answer to anything, nor will it ever be. You can't run away from life or problems. Its never too late to change things for the better, and this poem sounds a bit depressed. I personally prefer a more optimistic view on the world and its flaws.

This is possibly the best poem I have read on this site. This is could be worthy of big-time publication. Write on!

Wow. I find it extremely interesting how people are interpeting this poem. It is a bit confusing but hey that's why we re-draft right? I believe this poem is great and with some minor revisions, it'll be superb.(: But I honestly feel that you did a great job on it. I understand the message your are trying to share with us reader and know that you're not a pessimist. I entirely agree with your view. But for others, it might be hard to decipher so as I stated earlier, make a few revisions and this poem will be even more powerful!(: Keep up the good work Victoria!(:

I definitly enjoyed this poem... u are a great writer and I mean that for surw thanksz for such a great write =] <3

WOW This article's been best-rated in like forever, and folks are sooooo right to do so!!! Victoria, you must be Awesomeness! =)

All I have to say is: If your poem is generating this much discussion, (whether positive or negative) it must be at least profound enough to invoke all this thought. Keep writing.

This one was strong, but I would suggest that next time, you try not to use so many cliches. You have promise if you can step away from the "pain" and "war" and "love" and "peace" stuff. I am looking forward to reading more from you.

Hmmm....

Though provoking, yet slightly distrubing.

To me, it sounds as if someone who has committed suicide is writing it from Heaven.

It presents a very true concept, however, that few people seem to grasp.

I would suggest reading the book Feed by M.T. Anderson. You would value its message about America

Um...I inturpreted this poem differently. I have read a lot of poems, but this one stood out. As you stated, many people have different opinions, but we also have different outlooks.

I have dealt with many problems and have dealt with them by writing, but I haven't exactly wrote a peice like this.

When I read the poem, it pretty much said to me, "Give up!" It sounds like we need to cheat our way out, and escape (as in 'go emo and kill yourself' kind of thing). Maybe I read it wrong, maybe I didn't, but that is what /I/ got from it.

I also have another problem with this peice. Seeing that you wrote about 'having brown skin' I don't know what race you are, or to whom you are speaking about and I will admit that today's society is hectic about rasism, but not everyone is like that.



You are giving the underside of all of this.

obviously all these ignorant people just want to look at the things that could be wrong with this amazing poem, and are oblivious to the wonderful message it has.

I loved your poem. It really made me think about the world that we as teenagers are getting ready to enter. im not sure if i interpreted it correctly, but i can understand the feeling of wanting to "break away". It is our generation that is stuck to deal with the problems in society and at times it can be a bit stressful. I hope that you continue to write. Please dont let negative comments put you down. You are a great inspiration to this generation.

Honestly, i agree with you. I don't think you're negative, i understand your point of view.I think like you

reading this poem, i think it is a strong message that our world needs to change. it is obviously not personal, but it has a strong meaning, and I admire that. Vicky, you should keep writing poetry, you are awesome. Love this poem.

Since when is poetry supposed to be happy and fluffy and reasonable and optimistic? Poetry is a raw and visceral art form, a way to express one's deepest feelings. To comment on the tone of the poem is to comment on the feelings the author had at the time. Keep that in mind. Without knowing the author, even with knowing her, you cannot say her feelings are unwarranted.

You know, I believe that it is the total and complete ignorance that our world and schools are filled with today that has absolutely destroyed creative expression itself.

One example: JUSTIN! Look at the comment that he left. He says this:

"My mummy said that she doesn't want me to hang out with someone like Victoria/Vicky. She said that she does not want me to get the idea to break away this "repulsive place where having a brown skin is like being a terrorist." She told me to prove it to this sad world that my brown skin means that I am beautiful, hard-working and honest. "No cheating," she said, "and change your world to the betterment"."

When did the writer EVER say that having brown skin is like being a terrorist? Go on, read through that poem. Nowhere does it say anything even close to that. What she actually says is that "being a terrorist is as easy as having brown skin". Honestly, I would not be surprised if the author herself was black (not that I know, of course, "Vicky" :) ). Even if not, Victoria is not calling people with brown skin terrorists, but rather stating the dark, terrifying reality that is our world today.

Okay off of my rant on Justin's comment... another thing I wanna hit: breaking away. So many of the comments on this page say "you can't just break away! that's so pessimistic! thats a coward's way out! blah de blah de blah!"

The feeling or urge that I, at least, get from this piece is that, yes, we do need to break away. Not break away from society as a whole or run away, but to break free from the evil of this world. We need to BE THE CHANGE and not be like everybody else. As the Apostle Paul said, "we are in the world, but not OF the world." This simply means that while we live on this wicked and evil earth, we need to be seperated. The world needs people to look up to - positive people who make an impact on lives - and that needs to be us.

Victoria's impact - her world that she breaks away to - is her pen. Her saber to fight for truth. Break free into your world, Victoria. Create love and beauty and joy. Dream on, because dreams do come true.

There is beauty in this world, people. We need to uncover it.