Walking along a path, in a place, I've never seen, or been on, before.. I should be afraid, I should want to turn around and leave, I should run- I can't. I won't. It's so peaceful. Huge trees that seem like they continue going up all the way to the sky.. Dark brown trunks and and forest green and brown vines that wrap and twist around the trunk like a coil and dangle from branches like the amazon. The scenery is beautiful; Even through the light, misted, fog I can see grass all around-it's as green as envy. I can hear water in the distance, but I can not yet see it.. It's a steady, reoccurring, noise- rushing water crashing into a pool of gods greatest gift.. It relaxes my body, I shut my eyes and send my body into a small panic.. Being unable to see sends my body into a frenzy and the rest of my senses begin to work even harder to make up for the lack of sight; The sound of the water is coming in clearer, I can practically feel it trickling down my skin and cooling me down-I can almost taste it on my tongue, and the sweet aroma of flowers is a moment of absolute bliss. I can't see, I'm in a place I've never been before, alone.. I should be afraid, so why am I so calm?


I open my eyes, yet again revealing the breathtaking site.. I blink my eyes a few times to readjust the lighting of this mystical place.. Then it catches my eye, the things that sent my senses into a frenzy, hundreds and hundreds of flowers line the path and cover the darkest parts of this forest- It was as incredible for the eyes as it was for my nose. There are flowers scattered all around, in every direction, and I see them in every color of the rainbow.. Yellow tulips, red roses, pink carnations, lovely lavender lilacs... Everything is so beautiful, I never want to leave.. Ever. I don't care how I got here or where I am.. I want to stay.. Things would be so much easier here.. I take a seat in front of one of the huge, beautiful, trees and let my back rest against the winding, stable, surface and close my eyes again, imagining the life I could live if I stayed here. None one to put up a font for, no one to disappoint, no one to get to get hurt by.. “No one would miss me anyway,” I think to myself, “They'd probably be better off.. If nothing else they'd be happier.. They could tell the church some lie about how I was abducted, cry for the cameras and beg them to find 'their little girl'..” I smirk to myself, isn't that a joke. No one wants the daughter who struggles to maintain a C average (despite the tutors). The daughter who's a freak and isn't bffs with the head cheerleader, that you see every Sunday, Wednesday, and at every Church and school event. The daughter who's birth parents didn't even want her..


The simplicity of it all brings a smile to my face, it would be so simple.. “No one would look for me here.” I say in my head and open my eyes to scan the forest back and forth quickly.. “No one, Ever.” I say to the forest, in no more than a hushed whisper.. A ringing interrupts my thoughts and brakes the silence.. “Where is that coming from?” I say , out-loud, to myself and begin to look around...


I stir uncomfortably under my sheets, I soon realize it was the alarm- I reach for it and sigh. It was just a dream. I look at the clock, the numbers flashing 5:30 am.. “Ugh!” I groan to myself and turn back onto my stomach and cover my head with a pillow, as if it would shield off mom and prevent her from waking me up. Of course it didn't, because, as if on cue, mom walks in and says “Heidi, Heidi, wake up. You have to get dressed for school,” She pauses for a second and I actually begin to think she's giving up, but then she starts to shake me, “Come on now, do you want to go in your pajamas? Wake up, Heidi, wake up.” I give up, I'm losing anyway. “Okaaay, I'm up.” I groan. She gives a smile indicating she's happy that I'm up and even happier that she won, yet another, argument, and then leaves my room. I decide it's probably best that I get up, “'laziness and disobedience will get you no where, Heidi.'” I say to myself and then can't help but laugh, realizing that I had just quoted my Dad. I toss my sheet over the edge of my bed, not caring where it landed and get up. I quickly find my sheet and realize I had thrown my blanket over the edge sometime in the middle of the night, as well.. “Oh well” I say and make my way over to my bathroom.


I open the door and look into the mirror attached to the outside of the medicine cabinet hanging above the sink. I look down at myself and can't help but smile at my transformers pajama pants and my 'Taste the rainbow' tank-top. I run my fingers through my tangled mess of short red hair and look into the big blue eyes that stare back at me from the mirror.. I take a second to examine myself, making sure I hadn't had any growths appear on my face while I slept the night before... All clear. Nothing but a pale face with freckles and blue eyes. The same as yesterday and the day before that.. I just stand there and stare, as if waiting to see if the girl in the mirror would disappear... I stand there for a few moments, in complete silence, and then decide that it's probably in my best interest to go ahead and take a shower. I turn away from my mirror and lift my top over my head, followed by my bra and then quickly shimmy out of my pajama bottoms and undergarments.. I leave them in a pile on the floor and walk over to the shower and reach for the curtain. The bright pink and bright orange, intertwining, swirly patterns on this still seems very girly, and ridiculous, but it had been my mom who had designed the bathroom for me.. The whole bathroom was focused around the pink and orange pattern; pink rugs, orange covers for both the lid and the back of the toilet, pink and orange towels (that you can't touch or use- only look at), and of course the walls with Pink, orange, and white stripes.. I snap back into reality and pull the curtain back and climb in.. I turn the water on and fool with the temperature, making sure it was the perfect mixture of both hot and cold, before pulling up the spout and letting the water poor down onto my head and rush over the rest of my body; sending chills up my spine. The reoccurring, and steady, noise of the water coming from the shower head instantly reminds me of my dream- I can't help but remember the forest that had seemed so real last night and the sound of the, unseen, water fall.. I do my best to keep a vivid image of the forest in my head as I wash my hair- massaging the soapy bubbles on my scalp, rinsing it out fully with the warm, comforting, water and then continue down my body to wash away anything and everything left on my skin. I reach down and turn off the water, open the shower curtain, and reach for my 'special towel'.. (My black spider man towel I had gotten for Christmas from my best friend, Shaina.) I grab it off the hook, climb out of the shower, wrap up in it and make my way back into my room. I glance at my clock the red numbers tell me it's 6:00 am... “Had I really been in there for a half hour?” I think to myself.. I decide that the time is unimportant and make my way to my dresser to get undergarments and to my closet to get clothes.


I open the door of my closet to revealing a line of many shirts, tank-tops, under shirts, hoodies, and t shirts hanging on hangers and rows of pants, shorts, leggings, and [the dreaded] church skirts lying on the shelves in the back of my closet. I quickly glance through my clothes and pull out a pair of my zebra print leggings, black skinny jeans with rips, a black undershirt, and my rugrats shirt. I get dressed quickly; putting on my bra and panties, putting on my leggings, pulling my undershirt over my head and then my Rugrats shirt soon after. I then lay day on my bed and prepare for the battle of 'get the skinny jeans on and up'. I push both of my feet to the ends of my skinnies and then pop then out through the leg holes. “Now the real fun begins.” I think to myself. A lay back, bend my knees with my feet on my bed, and push my stomach, hips, thighs, and butt upwards towards the ceiling. I begin to tug my size zero skinnies over a body that would fit comfortably in a size one and a half or, even better, two. I get them up my legs and with a little work, and quite a few frustrated grunts, groans, 'ughs!', and 'ergs!', I get them over and onto my butt and done up.


I hop out of bed and rush into the bathroom to plug in my hair straightener and turn it on; while I wait for it to heat up I brush and part my hair how I want it to be straightened. I straighten my hair quickly; but I make sure I get it all perfectly straight and I make sure I don't get burned.. I finish straightening my hair, quickly brushed my teeth, and rushed over to my closet and open it up revealing the full body mirror hooked to the inside of my closet door. I look into the mirror and examine everything I'm wearing; Jeans- tight, rip in right knee, rip in left knee and thigh (Zebra leggings showing through the rips). Shirt- white with purple half sleeves and a picture of the rugrats babies on it. Socks- I notice I'm not wearing any! I run to my dresser and pull out one camo sock, for my left foot, and one pink and black zebra striped one, for my right. I hop on my right foot while I put the sock on my left foot then switch and hop on my left to put my right sock on. I decide to slip on my black flats and wear them for the day. With my hair straight, my body fully clothed, my breath fresh and my teeth cleaned, I quickly glance at my clock that reads 6:45 am; I can finally be done.


I leave my room only to head down the stairs to the kitchen/dining room. I step into the dining room and see my Dad at the table reading a paper (with a plate with bits and pieces of pancakes, eggs, and sausage in front of him- and a cup of coffee), my brother Nathaniel sitting in his highchair and half eating- half playing with- a bowl with cut up pieces of pancakes and sausage in it, and my mom singing along to some song on the Christian music station and fixing another plate- probably for me. Only, I won't eat it- I never do.“Don't we look like the perfect little American family?” I say to myself and smirk, uncontrollably.


“Sissy!” Nathaniel yells excitedly, as he starts wiggling around in his high chair and reaching for me. (Even though I'm all the way across the room.) His happy squeals, and the way he yelled for me, causes Mom and Dad to look up, they obviously hadn't noticed me come in.. “G'morning, Natty!” I reply with the same happy, excited, energy in my voice. Galaxy, my pink Pomeranian puppy, runs out from under Nathaniel’s chair and jumps up on me- with her front paws on my shins. She barks and I reach down and pick her up- holding her in my arms. Dad greets me with a smile and a nice little nonchalant 'good morning', but something's bothering him- I can tell by his face.. I think about asking him what's wrong, but thinking that it's probably something I did immediately changes my mind- so I just take a seat next to Nathaniel, still cradling Galaxy in my arms, and hope he drops it. Which, of course, he doesn't. “Interesting outfit choice, Heidi Bear..” Dad says using his old nickname for me and speaking in his 'I'm trying really hard to be understanding' tone, “But can you breathe in those pants you're wearing?” I'm taken off guard, Dad usually leaves the clothes decisions, and criticism, to Mom.. “Yes, Yes I can.” I say immediately, and I scowl at him.. I hate being told what to do and how to dress; “I don't fit in anyway. Never have probably never will. So why try?” I think to myself and then my mom pipes up out of nowhere and says “So last day, Huh? Pretty exciting stuff, Heidi.” Obviously an attempt to distract the two of us from out little argument. I grit my teeth, turn away from my Dad, suck in a deep breath, and turn to my Mom with a glare still on my face.

“Heidi Marie,” she says in a unshakable voice, “Lets do our best to keep a respectful attitude, Shall we?” I'm not sure whether she expected me to answer or not, but I chose to just keep quiet and ignore the question. I guess she really didn't need me to answer because she kept right on talking without hesitation. “Sweetheart,” she starts in in a nice and more compassionate voice, “if looks could kill then you and Nathaniel would be raising each other...” She paused, giving me time to take in what she said, I guess. “Also, it's not as if your father asked you some strange and unreasonable question, Heidi.. And lets be honest; if those pants were any tighter they'd be attached to your skin..”


“Mom, I don't want to go change! I like how I look, and besides it's my last day! Let me make a statement. Let ME be ME. Please?” I put the nicest possible look I can come up with on my face and , with a pleading look in my eyes, I turn back to my mom. She's looking , disapprovingly, at my pants and I can tell she's still not happy with my attitude or with my back-talking- but I don't think she'll fight me on this.. “C'mon , Guys, please?” I say in one last attempt to win them over. “Pweeeeaaasssee?! Pwease?! Pwease?! Pwease?!” Nathaniel says, mimicking me. Mom sighs and looks at Dad, as if he had the answers and he could tell her what to do, and say, in this situation..


“Heidi, I don't understand the fashion choice you've made today and I DEFINITLY don't appreciate, or approve of, the attitude and arguing...” My father says, but he trails off in mid sentence.. So I, being the wonderful and persistent 15 year old daughter that I am, add but one word and help him finish his sentence.. “But..” I say in a cheerful, and rather pushy-persistent, tone. “But.. You're not showing off your body, although the legging-pantyhose-tights-like material wont stop the wandering eyes of teenage boys.. I'm going to go ahead and allow you to wear them.” I practically squeal with delight and I get a gigantic smile on my face upon him finishing his sentence. “Thank you! Oh, thank you! Thank you!” I say continuing to be cheerful about the pants, and I'm also a little more excited because I almost never win arguments with my parents.


“You're welcome, Sweetie.” He says, and with a quick glance at his watch he says, “Time to go, don't wanna be late.” He stands up and kisses Nathaniel on the top of his head says “See ya later, Champ.”, and makes his way over to mom; she says have a good day, he smiles and says that he will and he tells her to do the same, and then- with a small kiss- he smiles and says 'Lets get a move on, Heidi, don't wanna be late.' The same thing he does everyday. The same thing I do everyday.


“Okay, okay, I'm coming! I gotta grab my stuff.” I plant a kiss on the top of Galaxy's head, sit her on the floor, and cross the room and get my backpack and my phone. My backpack is nothing fancy; Just a white backpack made to look like it was splatter painted with bright neon colors; pinks, oranges, greens, yellows, and purples... Oh, and my phone is a Samsung Galaxy, myeh, I'm not complaining about that. Only, it has to stay on the kitchen cabinet so I don't use it after 'bed time'. As I pass I drop my bag on the floor and put my phone in my pocket, then grab Nathaniel out of his highchair and give him a huge hug. He puts his hands around my neck and holds me like that while we rock back and forth- from the left to right and right to left-crazily. He starts to throw a giggle fit and bounces around in my arms, we're having a swell time and then dads interrupts with the whole 'clearing his throat thing' meaning; times up, get your stuff and lets go. “I hava go bye-bye to school, gimme kisses, Natty.” I say as I pucker my lips out towards his face, he immediately leans in and gives me a slobbery excited kiss. Mom walks over and says “C'mon, Heidi, it's 7:05, get a move on.” She leans in and gives me a kiss on the cheek and then grabs Nathaniel from my arms,”Have a nice day.”


I pick my back pack up off the floor, throw the right strap over my right shoulder, shove my phone back down further in my pocket, and walk towards my dad and out the door, him following close behind. The last thing I hear before dad closes the door is Nathaniel saying “Sissy come back later? Yeah, Sissy be back later.” Everything peaceful and easy is now gone, it's over; home life is ruff, but it's nothing compared to high school...

Good morning, Reality.