Lovely is an insult. Amazing not enough.
Stellar isn’t quite there, and gorgeous is too rough.
Gazing at your face, I see your lips and hair.
But no man-made compliment could ever quite be fair.

Well, insults have come far over the centuries,
So I turn to them to depict what you mean to me.
But to not confuse my feelings with what I start to say,
Allow me to point out, it is now Opposite’s Day.

You are repulsive, repugnant, and rather skewed.
Your skin’s beyond grotesque and your face misconstrued.
Your laugh is a screech that slowly slaughters my ears,
While your floppy figure can propel me to tears.

I hope this is foggy and that you haven’t a clue
Of how much I really, very, truly dislike you.