My Life Without You | Teen Ink

My Life Without You

January 2, 2016
By Emma.H.96 DIAMOND, Kalamazoo, Michigan
Emma.H.96 DIAMOND, Kalamazoo, Michigan
65 articles 0 photos 67 comments

Favorite Quote:
You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should've behaved better. -Anne Lamott, from Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life.


I've been counting clicks of all the clocks around the house
Each one slightly off the other ones like tumbling building blocks
I've been folding sleeves of all your shirts in the bedroom
All the buttons and the frays and somehow you never looked worse
Than when you left me on the porch in my summer bathrobe
Carrying your favorite shoes from the living room and that one book you liked
And you drove away and with you went most of my dignity
Because the truth is I still haven't left the house where you proposed to me
Sitting on building blocks and old woolen socks and a promise that
You'd be back in a week or so but it's been a year and I think I should let it go

I can't wait any longer
I can't wait any longer
I've been waiting here for what seems like years
I've been waiting here for so long

I've been counting clicks of all the clocks around the house
One might say I've grown roots in the spot on our favorite couch
I've been shuffling all the paper things on the bookshelves
I'd stand up for myself but I don't think I can even move my feet
I've grown weaker and the bread and eggs don't fill the holes
That you dug me in the spring to plant the peonies near the front window
I see your favorite things in reflections of snow and rain and sunshine
I've been living here for so many years I don't know where I'd go
Sitting on building blocks and old woolen socks and a promise
That you'd be back in a week or so but it's been a year and I think I should let it go

I can't wait any longer
I can't wait any longer
I've been waiting here for what seems like years
I've been waiting here for so long

I've been counting clicks of all the clocks around the house
Muttering stupid things about engagement rings and our wedding vows
But its winter and it's colder and I can't seem to figure out
If it was me or the weather that made you want to run
And hideaway in yourself and your thoughts and all that you had won
Like your freedom and the one car we owned half of everything in our home
But you missed out on a lot of things like when I found out I was expecting
And all our adventures in our new car and leaving our house to move to the city
And it's all a dream I keep seeing hoping you'll regret ever leaving and come back
To our building blocks and our old woolen socks and the promise
That you'd be back in a week or so but it's been a year and I think I should let it go

I can't wait any longer
I can't wait any longer
I've been waiting here slowly drying tears
And I realize time has come and gone

I've been sitting here in this old house on our favorite couch
Singing our child to sleep with the beat of all the clicking clocks that never stop
But it's been a year and I should just stop expecting so much from someone who left me



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This article has 2 comments.


on Jan. 9 2016 at 5:56 pm
Emma.H.96 DIAMOND, Kalamazoo, Michigan
65 articles 0 photos 67 comments

Favorite Quote:
You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them, they should've behaved better. -Anne Lamott, from Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life.

@keelskat thank you so much, I'm so glad you like it!

keeleyg BRONZE said...
on Jan. 5 2016 at 8:25 pm
keeleyg BRONZE, Montclair, New Jersey
4 articles 0 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
live as if you were to die tomorrow. learn as if you were to live forever. - mohandas gandhi

this is honestly the best thing i've ever read.