Eyes pierce like teeth, they don’t watch but they’re there.
Eyes are everywhere, a scopophobic nightmare.
They see all the details, even ones I miss.
They laugh at things that aren’t there, things I may dismiss.
Sometimes they don’t laugh at all, sometimes I don’t mind.
Sometimes they include me, sometimes I’m left behind.

I’m afraid to be with them,
I’m afraid to be without them.
Afraid to be ahead,
Afraid to be behind,
They look from every direction, sometimes I hope they’re blind.

Every word whispered in between,
Whether it is kind or mean,
Sounds like tiny echoes, bouncing back from my own brain,
They even say the same words or maybe I’m just insane
Pinpricks scratching chalkboards in the back of my own mind
I hear the words I’ve been saying to myself all this time,

I don’t know what I’m doing,
I don’t know why I’m here,
I’d rather be at home than outside facing my own fear.
No one understands it
Maybe it’s just me
I just don’t know how to cope with social anxiety.