Imagine By neeT ladiciuS | Teen Ink

Imagine By neeT ladiciuS

January 26, 2021
By System_Error_26 PLATINUM, Edmond, Oklahoma
System_Error_26 PLATINUM, Edmond, Oklahoma
44 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
"When we're born we cry, because we feel the pain of living for the first time."- Alice C.<br /> <br /> "Always be yourself... Unless you can be Batman. Be Batman."- Andy Biersack<br /> <br /> "No matter how hard you try, you can never tame a wild spirit!"- CC<br /> <br /> "I am not a monster, I am but a man."- Ronnie Radke<br /> <br /> "Suicide is not cowardly! I'll tell you what's cowardly... treating someone so badly that they want to take their own life!"- Ashley Purdy<br /> <br /> "I'm an artist and I make art-arty-art-art!"- Andy Biersack<br /> <br /> "I'm TOP 'Stressed Out' what does that mean? I'm a rap fiend with a bad lead..."- NF<br /> <br /> "I GOT A JAR OF DIRT AND GUESS WHAT'S INSIDE IT!!!"- Johnny Depp


Imagine comin home every day,

mom and dad yellin away,

in the kitchen,

momma's crying,

cuz daddy cheated,

and now he's lyin.

 

Imagine takin the blame,

and bein called names,

she goes out of her way,

to make you feel pain,

and though she's never said it- you feel like a mistake.

 

Daddy's the physical type, 

won't tolerate nonsense of any kind,

he's easily angered,

never a smile on his face,

and all his words are full of disgust and hate.

 

Imagine wakin up every day, 

feelin drained,

don't wanna get up,

but you're too scared to give up.

 

Imagine takin pills everyday,

to help you concentrate,

but all it does is lock you in a box,

and throw you in a lake.

Now you're drownin in your thoughts,

and you can't tell what's real or fake,

cause you've lost track of the days,

when you last felt "Okay".

 

Imagine being told your whole life is a sin,

and you want to stop but you do it time and time again,

you want them to forgive,

but you don't know where to begin.

 

Imagine tryna OD,

at the age of 13,

tellin yourself "it's too late for me",

"there's too much pain,

and everybody hates me lately".

 

Imagine leaving scars on your wrist,

try to hide em with a bunch of bracelets,

[when it's new it's a battle lost,

but when it fades it's a battle won]

all you wear are long sleeves,

and hoodies.

When someone asks,

you blame the cat. 

 

Imagine flinching every time someone raises a hand near you,

you're so used to abuse,

that you forget people love you.

 

Imagine ducking every time someone walks by-

in a certain way,

every time someone goes to touch you,

you brase yourself- ready to be beat black and blue.

 

Imagine falling in love at 11,

you start to feel happy again,

until he says he needs time,

so you go about your normal life,

with no reason to doubt him.

Then you find out he cheated,

but you still love him,

so every time you see them,

you feel like weepin. 

 

Imagine being mentally abused,

always being lied to,

emotionally drained because you're always being used,

being told that you're not a 10 but a 2.

 

Imagine a fire constantly building up inside you,

a raging monster that you can't control,

waiting for one wrong move,

watching for the smallest window of opportunity.

 

Imagine being me,

probably wouldn't last a single day in my mind,

my demons would eat you alive.

While you lay awake at night,

you'll start to lose your mind. 

 

Imagine,

just imagine,

feeling this pain,

surrounded by hate,

abused day after day

just imagine being me for a day.


The author's comments:

I would like to clarify that I originally wrote this song when I was 14. Back then I was beyond depressed and, at times, extremely suicidal. I would also like to clarify that the person that abused me is no longer a part of my life. My mother was mentally abusive but she stopped. My dad used to do things that were extremely concerning, but he stopped when I tried to kill myself in middle school. 

I must also say that I did have terrible anger issues but ever since I found Ronnie Radke and Falling In Reverse, I have gotten better at realizing that it's okay to be angry all the time as long as you don't act on that anger. 

I would like to say thank you to everyone who was there for me through these dark times in my life and I would especially like to say thank you to my girlfriend Jordan and my boyfriend Kai for helping remind me that I am not what he made me think I was. Thanks to them I am now able to say I love myself...


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This article has 2 comments.


on Apr. 29 2021 at 4:43 pm
System_Error_26 PLATINUM, Edmond, Oklahoma
44 articles 0 photos 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
"When we're born we cry, because we feel the pain of living for the first time."- Alice C.<br /> <br /> "Always be yourself... Unless you can be Batman. Be Batman."- Andy Biersack<br /> <br /> "No matter how hard you try, you can never tame a wild spirit!"- CC<br /> <br /> "I am not a monster, I am but a man."- Ronnie Radke<br /> <br /> "Suicide is not cowardly! I'll tell you what's cowardly... treating someone so badly that they want to take their own life!"- Ashley Purdy<br /> <br /> "I'm an artist and I make art-arty-art-art!"- Andy Biersack<br /> <br /> "I'm TOP 'Stressed Out' what does that mean? I'm a rap fiend with a bad lead..."- NF<br /> <br /> "I GOT A JAR OF DIRT AND GUESS WHAT'S INSIDE IT!!!"- Johnny Depp

@Blossoms_Cotton I'm glad. My whole goal in life is to help open people's minds and help them see what can be and what HAS been.

on Apr. 28 2021 at 9:55 pm
Blossoms_Cotton, Phoenixville, Pennsylvania
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
This changed my life.