How bad did I give up? This is how bad.
3 F’s. 3 F’s on my report card.
2 in both my DE classes.
Disappointment.
1 in yearbook.
That class never really mattered anyway, I guess.
2 C’s.
Damn, Bre, you never use to settle for those.
What happened?
What?
Happened?
You wanted to be the best.
You strived to get the highest grade on every test.
You were afraid of those F’s.
Those things that, to you, meant death.
Why now do they not matter,
Like they use to?
Those things that made you think
If you ever got them,
Your parents wouldn’t love you.
Except you still think that’s true.
Asked repeatedly,
why,
Why,
WHY?
What happened to your motivation?
That drive?
That thing that gave you life
Purpose.
That gave you something to be proud of.
What. Happened.
What happened to being just good enough?
What happened to wanting to be almost
Perfect?