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I Haven't Lost
I haven't lost my sister.
I haven't lost my friend.
They say we are the lucky ones
and expect the pain to end.
They say it could be worse,
flood my mind with others' sorrow.
They fail to realize that each day
we fear the fires of tomorrow.
So it's not cancer.
So she's not dead.
So what she could spend the rest of her life
in the confines of her bed?
"I'd die for that diagnosis,"
they smile and they joke
and fail to realize, slowly
our world fills up with smoke.
I haven't lost my sister,
but this is still a fight.
A struggle, a vein of icy tears
to keep us up at night.
So the worst has yet to happen.
We'll be ready when it does.
But does that mean I can't mourn
what her life once was?
I haven't lost a sister.
I know I never will.
But please remember to be gentle-
we are suffering still.
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A month in. There will always be something worse, but we can't be made to feel bad to lament our own plight.