It controls her.
She can't stop it.
It's a constant battle.
She can't drop it.

It has become a habit.
She can't quit.
It's taking over her body.
Bit by bit.

The scars fade.
But the memories don't.
She wants them to leave
But they refuse.. They won't.

It's an on going battle.
It's a fight she never wins.
It's a constant struggle.
It's a war that never ends.

It's her sweet escape.
It gets her lost in her own place.
She gets to control the pain.
As her adrenaline starts to race.

She grabs it off the dresser.
As a tear falls from her cheek.
She presses even harder.
Reminding herself not to shriek.

No one understands.
No one ever will.
This habit now controls her.
As the world around her stands still.

But now the room is spinning.
Her head is getting light.
She falls back in her bed.
Refusing to put up a fight.

She takes one last breath as she turns out the lights.
Then she closes her eyes as she calls it a night.