"I Didn't Know" | Teen Ink

"I Didn't Know"

November 27, 2011
By SylviaSalinger BRONZE, Los Angeles, California
SylviaSalinger BRONZE, Los Angeles, California
4 articles 0 photos 1 comment

I didn’t know I loved the smell of coffee on Sundays,
Sipping it, wearing a nightgown, reading the paper.
I didn’t know how much I loved saying nothing,
Until I let myself.
I didn’t know I liked picking up other people’s words
When they were dropped.
I didn’t know what barefoot felt like,
Until I hurt my soles, soles becoming leather,
Until I felt like some Puerto Rican grandma
Whose shoes are falling apart.
How could I have known how much I like the beauty
Of things falling apart,
Because we all do at times?
I didn’t know I loved tonight,
Until I stayed up through all of it,
Wondering what everyone was doing,
With the lights off, at that exact moment.
And then it was gone.
I didn’t know I liked to cackle,
Which makes me grin,
Which I also like (when it’s from the heart.)
I didn’t know how to embrace the rain,
Until I pranced in it,
Swallowed it,
And caught a cold because of it.
I didn’t know I needed home,
Until I wasn’t in it, and didn’t have one.
I thought I liked the sound of car crashes
Until Momma told me he died in one,
Which made me change my mind.
I didn’t know I loved the sound of typewriter keys
Until I smashed them,
With savage fingers,
So they all went off at once,
Jangling, percussive,
My literary philharmonic.

The author's comments:
My mother lost her fiance in a car accident and I have a close friend whose mother died in an accident as well. I wanted to make sense of these tragic deaths and use death as a way of appreciating the simple pleasures that one can so easily take for granted.

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This article has 4 comments.


on Dec. 7 2011 at 2:11 pm
Tori_Lie-write SILVER, Albuquerque, New Mexico
8 articles 0 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
Be yourself, no one will care if you fly off the top of the roof and make it to the unicorns.

This put me to tears, the world is faced with so much loss, so please don't let your talent be lost. You made me re-think about my family...and how much I miss them.

on Dec. 7 2011 at 10:27 am

"...I like the beauty of things falling apart" So very honest and true of many, a raw admission of enduring loss. Wise beyond your years.

Well done.


on Dec. 7 2011 at 12:56 am
SylviaSalinger BRONZE, Los Angeles, California
4 articles 0 photos 1 comment
Thank you so much! I love Franny and Zooey. It's the best. Much appreciated man!

waver1der95 said...
on Dec. 7 2011 at 12:51 am

Riveting and beautiful and bold.

"I'm sick of just liking people.  I wish to God I could meet someone I could respect," as Zooey would say.  

And you my dear Sylvia Salinger: I have found you are respected by all the stars in the sky.