I’m slowly becoming aware of the continuous ticking
my clock makes on the wall just left of me.
The creaking of the floor and the popping of the vents
come into complete synchronization with this.
Left and right the sounds illuminate the room
My eyes follow accordingly.
The fan of my computer brings me back to center.
That’s when total realization of this takes place.
My fingers marching across the keyboard
Come to a sudden halt
Loud banging makes a rhythmic tune
Above me, below me, all around me.
The light sound of my toes cringing and scrunching
Against the fibers and strings on my blanket come into play.
I swallow.
It’s like a river rushing down the waterfall that is my throat.
And my breath out is the surrender to the inevitable crash this entails.
My mind is a Farris wheel; spinning.
These sounds circulate the room forming words;
conversations one cannot interpret.
This soon becomes overwhelming,
And I stop my fingers, close my eyes, hold my breath, cover my ears…
And let out a scream.
The awareness simply consumes my sanity.