I wish I had a time machine
not because I want to go back
to fix my mistakes
(although that's a good idea too)
but because I want to move ahead
to when everything has faded to blurry,
tiresome, disconnected moments
at last
to when all the tears are dried
and forgotten
and all the battles are lost and won
and gone
it's bound to happen someday
someday I will be able to be with you
without causing
anyone
any pain
this must end at some point
in the future
it can't just stay forever
an endless set of railroad tracks
that go straight to the horizon
so now
I wish I had a time machine
to skip ahead
to when the memories are rusted and dull
and their edges no longer break the skin
to when I can honestly say
I don't care
anymore