Just listen
As I tell you of
A story that you
Probably know very
Well. In fact, you might
Be able to tell the story
Better than I'll tell it here.

Even the best of us experience
This at one time or another. It
Starts as a small seed - one that
You don't pay much attention to.

As you go through life you notice certain
Things that you would have differently if
You could. Or objects that you could use
Or enjoy if you had them. A bigger house,
A nicer car, a better paying job, a more
Responsive father. Then there are the rest
Of us not-as-fortunate people who wish for
An affordable house, a car that runs, an active
Relationship with Dad, and even a part time job.
It doesn’t really matter what the desire may be,
A little wishing never did anyone any harm.

Later you meet or run into people, and you're allowed
Privileged glances into their lives. As you take your
Look, you see that they have been blessed with the
Very thing that you have wished for. They have a nice
House, he has a better car, she’s cool with her dad,
He loves his job. You feel a twinge of longing - But hey,
You can't hate the player, it's the game that stinks.

Of course we all have been told that the grass is always greener
On the other side but there's still that urge to run next door and
Steal the fertilizer. One can't help but ask "Why them? Why not
Me?" After awhile you can't seem to notice anything at all except
For the green tint of that grass. You get another, darker green glint
In your own eyes. Such is your obsession with that which you don't
Have that you can't seem to appreciate those things that you do have.

Unbeknownst to you, that seed that you thought nothing of begins to grow into
Something that you would have never guessed. It’s like the unwanted weed that
Grows in your yard – you know it’s there, but you don’t bother to stop it. Days later,
You wish you had dealt with it. While you had the chance. The weed consumes and
Demands attention. It kills all of the good around it and destroys the once healthy
Surroundings. Now you’re even worse off. The neighbor’s yard looks, nice, green, and
Luscious, and yours is mangled, strangled, and sick. You wish that you could have
Appreciated it while it was still there. You never know what you’ve got until it is gone.

So you’re totally consumed. This feeling is getting way out of hand. It’s like finding much too late that
You are trapped in quicksand. You look around at the greenish – brown muck and finally can put a
Name to what you’ve been feeling all this time. You’re jealous. And you haven’t seen it although it’s
Been spelled out before you, just like this poem. The signs are all there: the anger, insecurity, and scorn.

You see it now, as you have countless times before. Each time it happens,
You promise yourself that you’ll catch it the next time— that you won’t let
It master you. But it constantly crouches at your door and each time
You find yourself in Cain’s position, struggling to find your way out
Of jealousy’s desolate grip. I can see you nodding with me in
Agreement, but my advice to you is this:
Stop nodding.
Get your own
Fertilizer.