Being engulfed by a powerful force
That seizes my trembling body ever so tightly
As my fading conscience grows numb
And as a violent surge of adrenaline rush
Creeps into every part of my burning flesh
I start to grow frustrated and horrified
I keep reminding myself “This is just a mere nightmare of panic attack.
It will go away within seconds.”
But my heart is already pounding ever so vigorously
Making me pant, turn red and search for the nearest exit
“If only, if only I can free myself from this merciless, painful grasp.
If only, if only I can break this vicious cycles of panic attack!”
I nervously wipe my sweaty palms onto my jeans
Afraid that people might find out about my disability
Embarrassed that people might find me strange and insane
I feel a choking sensation
I feel as if I am an eternal captive of this lurking illness
That is after my hopes of being like others without panic attacks
Its single, brutal touch disturbs my ease with intense sensations
Of ceaseless horror and anxiety
Everyday, I pray and pray that I could defeat this unyielding enemy
And I cry and cry that I could be my normal, healthy self again
Who can live without the petrifying symptoms
Who can be free from a state of imprisonment of loneliness and dread
I just wish and wish that I could rid of this monstrous, demonic entity forever and ever
Thus, freeing myself from this on-going, torturous fear