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A Free Bird's Song
October 17, 2009
Trapped in a cage, the bird can't sing,
Without its song, its broken hearted, and broken winged
Its chirp is soft, he's all alone,
Hoping he could leave the cage, and finally fly home,
His energy is leaving, and he's giving up faith,
Because he realizes there's no way to escape,
From his hands nor his feet, The bird lies down weak in defeat,
He feels a hand on his back, and a voice whispers, “Remember nothing can go wrong,”
He's finally allowed to sing a free birds song.
© Carly M., Hopedale, MA
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This article has 2 comments.
NorthernWriter said...
on Oct. 24 2009 at 6:43 pm
I like the theme. it's very thoughtful, but I feel you can make your poem by using more creative language. See, poetry is so small and condensed that in order to say what you want to say in just a small number of lines, you have to use brilliant language to appeal to the senses. May be call the bird exhausted? open a thesaurus, a writer's best friend! I hope I helped? Please check out some of my poems and tell me what you think :)
