One day I was sitting on the beach, eating a pound of pastrami,
When I looked out to the water and spotted a tsunami.
I was too full to run, too hot to trot and too grumpy to be jumpy,
So I continued to lie on the sand, which was lumpy.

I got to my knees when I heard my mother calling from afar,
She said, "get all your things together and get in the car."
A sudden gust of wind pulled me into the sea.
The water was so rough, who would save me?

The waves were higher than any ocean wave,
They rained down on me but I had to be brave.
I was thrown up in the air about 120 feet,
I thought to myself maybe Mr. Tsunami and I should talk and meet.

I know my mother is not going to save me it's too late.
In that one moment I knew this was my fate.
I felt a tap on my shoulder, Mr. Tsunami wanted to talk.
I said, "are you crazy? Go take a walk!!"

I was hit by another wave, Mr. Tsunami was getting mad.
Maybe he was just very lonely and sad.
I had no time to lose; I was running out of air.
Mr. Tsunami threw me back to the beach and I think that was fair.