Personally, I wouldn't change the poem. I'm really funny about that stuff b/c I hate to change a poem once its written down (aside from minor changes) but that's just me. I'd be afraid to change it because it is already so beautiful. I'f you wanted to add in some more metaphors though, you could start describing a women right off of the last stanza but connected and then break off into other stanzas. That way it shows that they are really connectede though they seem different at first. I hope this helps!!!

P.S. Thanks so much for your comment on "May 22, 2009 (a)" I really appreciate it!!!! Happy writing :)

<3 despurlock <3

It started out as a poem to describe a woman actually, and I was going to do more metaphors than just the ocean. But then it sounded so good this way. Do you have any suggestions to make the metaphor more noticeable?

I really love this piece! It beautifully describes the ocean and how it can be many things to many people! I love your words choice ("a temptress" "a mother"). This is a beautiful piece! Great job!