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Double Trouble
Ear rings, the only physical quality that separates my twins look, from my look. Most often, the first thought people have when they figure out I’m a twin is, “Wow, I wish I had a twin.” Usually I quickly reply with, “No you do not.” I used to not enjoy having a duplicate of me at all. Although truthfully, having a twin is one of the biggest blessings in my life. I am so thankful for Jill. I do not know how I would survive without her. So many good things have came to my life because I have an astonishing sister, like Jill. However, there are still a few bad things that come with being a twin.
Growing up a twin was very hard for me. Constantly having people call you the wrong name because you look exactly alike was terrible. Sometimes people would even label us with numbers, nick-names, or they would just say, “Hey twin.” It was even worse when your own parents would call you the wrong name. Every time this happened it made me feel like I was not important or I did not even deserve to have a name. It made me wonder why everyone could remember everybody else’s, but not mine. Was I not important enough, or did they just not want to take the time to remember it? It also made me very angry when someone would be having a conversation with me and I could tell they had no clue who they were talking to.
Another negative that came with looking exactly like Jill was having people think we were the same person. Constantly having people ask me if we do everything the same way, if we dressed alike, if we could read each others’ minds, or if when I looked in the mirror if sometimes I thought I was Jill, quickly got extremely old. When someone asks me one of those questions, in my mind, I just want to freak out because all those have an extremely obvious answer: NO. After all, hearing this all the time got my mind going. It sometimes made me think that we had to be or do all those things to be “good twins.” It was a constant battle of mine. I wanted to be my own person and not look anything like her, I just wanted to be me. On the other hand, in my mind I also wanted to be all those things, just to please everyone.
The battle is slowly diminishing as I grow up. Even though people still call me Jill sometimes, I realize that it is something I am going to have to live with for the rest of my life and it is something I am completely willing to live with. I know that if that feeling was absent I would not have the pleasure of having my awesome twin. I would never trade Jill for all those feelings to be gone. Having a twin has made me realize how much people take for granted just being able to have their own name and own look.

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