The Envelope | Teen Ink

The Envelope

December 9, 2010
By TheCylceGoesRound PLATINUM, Raleigh, North Carolina
TheCylceGoesRound PLATINUM, Raleigh, North Carolina
24 articles 2 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
When the rich wage war it's the poor who die.


Summary:

Envelope is your average 14 year old girl who lives in the simple and boring 54th century - or so she thought. When she's thrown into the Program, she experiences stuff she would have never experienced if she had never fell into the well and got saved by that boy. So how come she's in a time-dome? How come the guy in the cell across from her looks so freakishly familiar? And how come they have robots if the capitol deleted all traces of them?


Emily M.

The Envelope


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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This book has 15 comments.


on Oct. 20 2011 at 8:56 pm
-r.o.x.i.U.- BRONZE, Raleigh, North Carolina
3 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
Why be the same when you can different?

Just saying once again...Your work is amazing!!! :D

on Sep. 21 2011 at 8:24 am
KJAngelAuthor SILVER, Holland, Michigan
7 articles 0 photos 19 comments

Favorite Quote:
With understanding comes wisdom.

I'm waiting for more! Please email me when you've got more... for some reason, TeenInk won't let me mark this as one of my favorites! Thanks so much, KJ.

on Sep. 10 2011 at 7:40 pm
AbbyOliver6 BRONZE, New York, New York
1 article 0 photos 57 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Every cloud has a silver lining" and "I don't get distracted easil-SQUIRREL!"

This is great! But i think it goes a little fast. Can't wait to read more. P.S check out my book, its called The Searcher's Allies. But wait a day or two cuz i posted up the new chapter

on Aug. 8 2011 at 11:21 am
Tongue_Blep PLATINUM, ????, Ohio
40 articles 1 photo 769 comments
 I want more!!! wow that was sooo kewl! I very nice piece of work! great job! I just posted a new story i wrote called: Alien invasion series book one: the caller. If any of u had time please go check it out and post feedback and comments. It would be much appreciated! Thanks! and keep writing everyone! :)(:

on Jul. 12 2011 at 9:27 am
charlizdris SILVER, Raleigh, North Carolina
9 articles 1 photo 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." ~Forest Gump

OMG Em! Finish the story my mind will explode if you don't! I loved it thought! You are an awesome writer!

<3 ;)


sheashea said...
on Jun. 25 2011 at 2:18 pm
wow i love it so far its sorta like james patterson's maximom ride series keep on writing

on Jun. 25 2011 at 1:54 pm
kkayla3897 BRONZE, Ogden, Utah
1 article 0 photos 39 comments
haha. this reminds me so much of the Hunger Games, but I like how they're fused with animals. Keep going. I see a few spelling mistakes, but they can be ignored because of the great story line! Just make sure to make it your own, even more different than the Hunger Games.

on Jun. 17 2011 at 9:40 pm
SarcasticPersonInTraining BRONZE, Woodbury, Minnesota
3 articles 0 photos 48 comments
ok first of all i pretty much loved it :) really great descriptions and adjectives like WOW i was additced from the first paragraph! i think u need to do a bit of editing and i did get a tinyyy bit confused by some sentences and also i got confused why flat hit envelope but i love the concept and i love the story its ilke a mix of maximum ride and the hunger games if uve read either of those and i also love that willow is forest! (he sounds hot btw :) ) i think maybe u shud include about how long she hasnt seen forest cuz i was thinking why wouldnt she recognize willow is forest? so ya but overall AWESOME! :) keep writing and plz check out my story Last Note adn commetn and rate plz! id love to hear feedback from ya! :)

on May. 23 2011 at 4:11 pm
Ashley_Tucker, Granger, Indiana
0 articles 0 photos 66 comments

Favorite Quote:
Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real? ~ Albus Dumbledore

All in all pretty good. I'm not sure which is which, but you seem to switch between 1st and 3rd person. A bit confusing at times. Check out my novel Shaya's Story, please. (:

on May. 12 2011 at 4:10 pm
JoPepper PLATINUM, Annandale, Virginia
35 articles 0 photos 782 comments

Favorite Quote:
&quot;Freedom is the ability to not care what the other person thinks.&quot;<br /> <br /> &quot;Not all those who wander are lost&quot; --JRR Tolkien<br /> <br /> &quot;When you are listening to music it is better to cover your eyes than your ears.&quot; --Jose&#039; Bergamin

I think it has a good plot but I was kind of got confused.  You said something about flying teenage boys, But it  didn't say anything about them in the story. Are you continueing this? 

charmiypiggy said...
on Mar. 13 2011 at 7:59 pm
charmiypiggy, Melbourne, Other
0 articles 0 photos 116 comments

Favorite Quote:
You eat food for the enjoyment of it; the fact that it helps you stay alive is just a bonus.

The concept you have for this is quite intriguing; I love reading about how things might be in the future. However, I thought that it was a little blunt. Just telling us that cancer's been cured is boring. Try to slip it in somehow. For the first chapter, try to put more spaces in. 

I did find it a little confusing, especially with the Any-thing part. I don't get it. And you have a couple of minor grammar mistakes as well. 

Don't get me wrong, this is a very good piece of writing; I just think that, if it were to be improved, it would be a much more enjoyable read. Also, if you want, please check out my novel Hunted. You can find it in the most discussed novels section. Great work!


on Feb. 11 2011 at 6:13 pm
D.B.Kinkers BRONZE,
1 article 0 photos 16 comments
I love it!

on Feb. 11 2011 at 2:23 pm
Ebonykitty SILVER, Naples, Florida
8 articles 1 photo 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
You can&#039;t run out of dreams. Dreams are the start of everything...

I love it! It's fantastic. I love the way you show who Envy, Olive, and Forest are like. And the way you show the world around them.

I can't wait to read more! It's amazing so far!

~Ebony~


mal12 said...
on Jan. 8 2011 at 11:57 pm
mal12, California
0 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
it&#039;s classy-not classic.

wow! i absolutly love your story! i  like the concept of it and how it's in the future. i really think you should continue with this story, it could go far! please write more soooonnnnnnn!!! :)