Sandy and I continue down the boardwalk taking our time, gossiping about possible beach mixer couples. When we reach the main center of town, we enter a few clothing shops and boutiques, before making our way to Delia’s Sweets. Delia’s is amazing. There are racks of chocolate wrapped in colorful paper, glossy to the touch; sweet smells of sugary delights wafting through the air, stimulating our noses; and the taffy, bright colors and 38 flavors all accounted for. There is sour apple, cherry, licorice, mocha, blueberry, peppermint, the nasty purple flavor, and so many more. Sandy’s eyes glow in delight. I head straight for the chocolates, picking out a chocolate infused with an orange filling.
Sandy gathers handfuls of taffy, until her bucket is spilling over.
“It’s for my entire family!” Sandy proclaims, but I know that half of it will be gone by the time we reach the car in the beach parking lot.
We reach the car in the nick of time because just as I slam the door closed, rain pelts the windshield. Dark clouds have rolled in and the wind has picked up. I begin to shiver, partly from nerves and partly from my lack of clothing. The fastest way back to our neighborhood is through a dirt road. Out of habit, Sandy starts her way down the road, neither of us thinking of the potential muddy situation we could get ourselves into. About halfway home, the rain picks up causing the once solid dirt to turn thick and fluid. The mud entraps our car, and after several failed tries to get out, we call a car service. Sandy is hysterical and I do all I can to calm her down.
The service car splashes through the mud, making its way toward us. Once he has pulled up to Sandy’s car, the serviceman comes around and clips a strange device onto Sandy’s car. The hood of Sandy’s car now has, what appears to be a claw, protruding from the front of it. This “claw” is then hooked onto the truck of the service car, making the two cars fastened together.
“If you would, could you please get into your car,” the serviceman says. Sandy and I do as told just as the serviceman disappears into his own car. Suddenly our bodies lurch forward. My hands catch me before I hit my head on the still contained air bag. “POP!” A sound erupts from outside like the sound of a gun being shot, as we’re lurched forward once more. Finally we start rolling slowly over the thickening mud. We are pulled along, until the muddy road becomes sturdy gravel. Once a safe distance away from the mud entrapment, the serviceman comes towards us. As he walks our direction, I take him in for the first time. He looks about 18 or so and is relatively attractive. He is tall with sandy brown, short, cropped hair. His eyes are a charcoal color, and he is squinting, protecting himself from the rain.
“You girls should be alright now. Must say, it was a bit of a risk to try and take the dirt path during a rainstorm like this.” The rain is coming down hard now, and beads of water are now forming on the serviceman’s clothes and body.
“Oh, I know! It was just out of habit!” squeals Sandy. Her eyes are glowing with the delight. She wears the look she always has on her face whenever she finds someone attractive. The serviceman looks directly at me saying, “Well I am glad you’re alright. You could’ve been trapped for a while there. I’m glad I came here.” I feel my cheeks heat up again. Sandy quickly responds saying, “Well we were lucky you came to save the day.” She flashes him a smile, but he ignores her completely. Looking directly at me with a fierce gaze he says, “How about you pay me back for saving you, by giving me the honor of taking you out tonight.” Sandy nudges me all excited. Her eyes keep darting from him to me with anticipation.
“Umm, sure, why not. Thanks,” I reply.
“The name’s Peter.”
“Peter. Okay.”
“Why do I get the feeling you’re not to into this date?”
“Oh, I am sorry, I just don’t have many strangers asking me to dinner.”
“Well if you’d rather not go...”
“No! Of course she wants to!” Sandy butts in, not liking where this is going. She probably will not give me a rest about this after Peter leaves.
“Yah, no, I do want to go. Sorry, ignore Sandy,” I say nodding my head in Sandy’s direction. Sandy is now giving me a look so harsh I can feel her eyes burning my skin. “I just wasn’t prepared for you to ask me out, that’s all.
“Well, if it helps, it is just dinner, no pressure,” he says. I smile, genuinely excited for tonight.
“I am Julia by the way,” I say.
“Nice to meet you Julia.” He says my name so seductively that I cannot help but smile. “I will meet you at eight at Cardillas then, the little Italian place on the corner, by the beach?”
“Alright.”

“I cannot believe you,” Sandy says. “You always act so shy around guys. Now he probably thinks you’re totally not into him! I mean, I had to accept the offer for you! Come on, Julia! He was so hot!”
“Hey! That’s not fair! You know I am shy around guys and to make things worse, you accepted his request for me! How does that help my confidence in any way?”
“Alright. Fine. I was out of line, but he is so hot, I can’t believe you weren’t jumping for joy at his request.” I laugh. As Sandy is with Jeremy, and I am still single, she always tells me how I should have acted around guys, but what she is really trying to say is, how she wanted to react to the guy’s attention. Of course she tries not to react, but most of the time, she ends up staring me down to hide her own emotions.
“Well, it was obvious you would’ve jumped for joy at his request. You just couldn’t stop flirting,” I tease.
“Ha-ha, very funny. I was flirting for your sake.”
“Oh okay, Sandy!” Now we’re both laughing at the ridiculousness of this idea, a person flirting for the benefit of a friend.
The minute I get home, I go into “freak-out mode”. What should I wear? Something sexy or simple. Do I wear make up or go natural? High heels or modest shoes? Oh, shit! My hair is nasty from the wind today! Oh my god, is this really what I looked like when he saw me? These thoughts keep running through my head. I go through every detail of my appearance worried about what Peter was thinking. I have never been on a date with a complete stranger, and I am a little nervous. At times like these, I would go to my mother for help, but she and my dad are out at work. Knowing Sandy, she would suggest I go full out sexy, but that has never been my forte. There is one other person I can trust to give me advice, Carly. Carly is older, in her early 30s, and she is an employee at Marley’s Boutique. I have gotten to know her very well over the years. She has bright red hair, which she keeps in curls, pined up on top of her head, she wears these bright green glasses, which enhance her brilliant green eyes, and she is always seen with peachy lip gloss that makes the red of her hair and green of her eyes seem even more vibrant.
My fingers know what numbers to press to reach her by heart. I dial Carly’s number rapidly, praying that she will pick up and after one ring she does,
“Hello!” she says in a way too expectant voice.
“Hi it’s Julia! Were you waiting for someone else to call?”
“Hi Julia, honey.” Carly’s tone indicates that she is down spirited as she continues saying, “Sorry honey, I do want to talk to you! It is just that, I meet this spectacular guy last night. He was so charming and handsome. And we had such a great time together. And when he asked for my number, he was so sincere about it and it felt like a real promise. And then he walked me home. He didn’t try anything on me though, but he said he had had a nice time and would be seeing me around!” She finishes, out of breath from talking a mile-a-minute.
Carly doesn’t understand men. No woman truly understands them, but Carly suffers terribly. “Seeing you around,” wasn’t the most promising thing to say after a date, but Carly thinks whoever said it was promising her another date. She needs to learn how to decode men, and fast.
“Oh, I am sorry Carly! I don’t know though, he does not sound too promising. But for your sake I hope it all works out!” I reply. These few lines are usually all that is needed to snap her out of her funk.
“Oh thanks hon! One day when you’re old like me, I hope you have better luck! But anyhoo, what can I do for you today?” I tell her about Peter and my concerns as to what to wear and how to act. Although she has had many relationship problems herself, her experience makes her a great advice giver.
“Oh, well that is simple, honey! Go casual with jeans and a cute t-shirt. Then doll it up with a fun up-do and sexy heels. That is the perfect first date look. And when it comes to how you should act, be yourself, but do not be afraid to flirt a little with the waiter. That shows how desirable you are. Oh! If the waiter is a girl, be friendly and give her tons of compliments! You will do great!” Carly tells me.
“Thanks Carly! Good luck with your guy!”
“Thanks hon! Oh! Do come by the shop. We have tons of new hot suits!”

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I throw on my dark jeans and a plain white t-shirt. I add a little rouge to my cheeks and wear small diamond stud earrings. To spice up my look I put a ruby stud in my second piercing on my left ear and wear sultry red pumps. I add a little pink gloss to my lips and throw my hair into a loose bun. Before I head out, I text Sandy and ask her to give me all the details of her date tonight. We had gotten so obsessed with discussing Peter earlier, that I had forgotten to ask her to tell me how her own date goes. I park in the beach parking lot, which stays open all night, then make my way to Cardillas. I see Peter walking a few feet ahead, so I linger back wanting him to get there before I do. Once, he is in the restaurant I make my way up the path. Just as I enter, he calls my name, waving me over. I smile and casually walk over to our table. We order drinks, and as I am starving, I ask for bread.
“Oh, I uhh, already ordered some bread and cheese to start. If that is alright,” says Peter.

“Perfect,” I say. Peter’s plays with his fingers, feeling each one as if he were blind and were trying to memorize the shape of each finger. He seems nervous, so I quickly think of an icebreaker.

“So, how’d you get into the car service business?”

“Oh, well, I needed the money and it seemed like a pretty decent job so I applied and got it. But, I know, it is not very impressive or anything. I just needed the money, you know?”

“Yah, I gotcha.”

“Wait it is not like a turn off or something, that I work as some crappy serviceman.”

“No…. Just curious is all,” I cannot help but smile as I say this. For the first time, I have met someone more self-conscious than myself.

“Oh, okay, good!” replies Peter. The waiter comes around to take our food orders, but I feel that Peter will become really self-conscious if I flirt, so I decide to ignore that piece of advice. We both order pasta with Alfredo sauce.

“So…you go to what school?” I ask. “I have not seen you around Edinburg Prep School.”

“Ah, yah. I go to school in Boston actually, I just graduated Boston Day School for Boys.”

“Oh yah! I think we have played you guys in sports. Wait do you live there?”

“Yeah, I live in South Boston, it’s only about a half an hour away from here. But, uh, you said something about sports. Do you play any? I am not a big jock or anything, but I like to run.”

“Oh that’s cool. Yah, I play a few sports, but I am more into my music.”

“No way! What do you play?”

“Piano and guitar.”

“Oh gosh! You have to teach me guitar one day!” I laugh. I tried to teach music my Junior summer, but I was not very successful. “I can play piano pretty well though,” Peter continues. “We should jam out one time.”

“Yah maybe.” I wasn’t into the whole “playing together” thing. I like to play my own music on my won time. I fell a buzz in the pocket of my jeans. I pull out my phone and see the text is from Sandy.

Great Night!! I’ll fill you in later!! How’s Peter?

I send a quick reply saying, Yes do fill me in! It’s been going pretty well…Not so sure about him yet—not much personality. When I return my gaze upward, I notice the steaming plate of pasta in front of me. It is the prefect creamy consistency. The waiter welcomes our meals to us with a cheery, “Bon Appetite!” I excitedly dive into my dish.

“Mmhh, yum! So good!” I say. Peter laughs and then readily agrees. The night goes on and we continue to discuss music and our different passions. I find out a lot about Peter that night. He has a lot of interesting qualities, but he is extremely self-conscious and insecure. It turns me off and makes me lose interest in him. He gently wraps his hand over mine then flinches saying, “Oh is this alright?”

“Yah, it’s fine,” I say, unsure if it really is. His self-conscious “little boy” concern is freaking me out.

“Good, I did not want to concern you. But, uh, I was wondering if maybe sometime you could come to the shop and I could give you a tour or something.”

“Oh! Yah. Okay.” I reply.

I can’t think or anything worse to do, I think to myself.

“Great!” Peter says with a smile ear to ear. And we sit staring at each other.

This morning I wake up feeling happy. I walk downstairs in a robe and slippers and a loosely pulled back ponytail. The clock reads 8 o’clock. Today I have slept in a little longer than my usual 6:30 am wake up, and I feel well rested. I pour myself a steamy cup of coffee and idly watch as the cream mixes into the dark substance. Feeling very hungry, I decide to grease a pan to make pancakes. As I prepare “Aunt Jemima’s” pancakes, I remember Sandy and her date. Immediately, I grab the phone, my fingers dialing her number. She picks up after a few rings and even before she can get in a hello I ask, “Sandy! How was your date last night?”

“Oh, hey Juls,” she says sleepily. “It was just amazing! Jeremy asked me to the beach mixer!”

“Oh my god! How did he do it?!”

“Oh, it was so romantic. He took me to the pier and gave me a dozen white roses. Then he knelt on one knee and said, ‘Sandy, you are the only girl I have loved, and I love you so much. It would mean the world to me, if I were your date to the beach mixer. Would you do me the honor?’ Or at least something along those lines. I was so ecstatic that I let out a little yelp. Then of course I said yes and when I did, he tied a piece of string around my finger, symbolizing that I was his! It was the most beautiful thing ever!”

“Wow! Jeremy really made up for missing the beach yesterday! That is so great Sandy! I am so happy for you!”

“Aww, thanks Juls! Oh! Tell me about your date!”
“It was okay. Peter is sweet and he’s into music which is cool!” I try to remember other positives of the night, but there aren’t many. “But, oh my god! He has the most annoying lack of self confidence ever!”

“Ugh, that’s the worst. Well, do you think you’ll go on another date?”

“Um, well if your version of a date is sitting in a car service shop then yes!!”

“Oh wow! How romantic!” Sandy says in a sarcastic tone. She lets out a laugh, giddy from last night. “Peter seems a little awkward, but you never know, he could be your prince charming!”

“Maybe,” I say. “Oh! That reminds me! Can you come with me to Marley’s Boutique? Carly said they got some cute suits in, and I need your fashion advice.”

“Yes of course. I’m just a little tied up today with family and other stuff, maybe later tonight- Shoot! I forgot to tell you! Jennifer invited us over for pizza tonight. I know you don’t really like her, but James really wants us to go.”

“Why did James not mention this yesterday? Is he going to be there too?”

“Yah he is. Jennifer called me last night asking if you and I wanted to come over for pizza. Then I texted James, asking what the plan was, and he told me more details. He told me that there are a whole bunch of people coming over! Clayton, James, Jeremy, Jennifer, some of Jennifer’s cheer friends and their boyfriends, you, and me. It will be fun and a good time to have Peter meet everyone!”

Everyone: the term used to describe our friend group. It consists of Sandy, Jeremy, Clayton, James, George, Rick, Jennifer, and me. Rick and George are James’ closest guy friends and are the ones sharing the apartment with James next year. They are really awesome guys who can make you laugh so hard, your stomach muscle cramps up. As Jennifer is the “queen bee” her cheer friends and their boyfriends also hang out with us, even though, no one, not even James, likes the cheer girls. To me, the true core group is Sandy, James, and me. Our friendship is so perfect. There is ease and just plain happiness surrounding us whenever we are together.

I snap back into the conversation.

“Oh, do I need to invite Peter?”

“Yes, this will give you a chance to make a final decision on him! He’s like your new boy toy! Play with him a little before you throw him away!” We both let out a fit of laughter. We first learned the term “boy toy” from elderly woman, who was telling her friend about her new “boy toy”, whom she had recently made “passionate love” to. Sandy and I were so disturbed by this older woman and her love making that the term boy toy made us giggle in outer disgust.
After we have calmed down Sandy continues saying, “And before we go to Jennifer’s tonight, I will go with you to Marley’s to help you pick out some sexy suits and something hot to wear tonight. You will need to look good for them boys!”

I smile, so thankful for such a wonderful best friend, constantly looking out for me. “Thanks Sandy! I appreciate it! Pick you up at five?”

“Yeah, that should work! I’ll text you if anything changes.”

“Great!” I hang up the phone ecstatic for tonight’s plans. I can’t wait to see James and tell him all about the strange Peter!

I check the clock above the stove, and as I look up, the smell of burning pancakes becomes prominent. I had become so wrapped up in my conversation with Sandy, I had forgotten all about the cooking pancakes. I quickly turn of the stove and suddenly wonder why the fire alarm is not screaming, as a thick cloud of smoke has started to fill the kitchen. I cannot be bothered to worry about the fire alarm now though, so I clean up the burnt mess, deciding to stick to coffee for breakfast.
After I have wiped down my mess, I head upstairs to get ready for the day. I have a large balcony outside of my room, where I sometimes go to think and take in the sun. I step outside and feel that it is another windy day. Not willing to lose my shorts this early in the summer, I bear the nip of the wind, and decide to wear my blue-cuffed shorts, silver wedges, and red bohemian style, long sleeved shirt. I send a quick text to Peter informing him about tonight. We plan to meet at Marley’s Boutique at 6:30, which will give Sandy and me enough time to shop. Just as I am about to head out the door to buy groceries, I get a text from James.
I want to see you before Jennifer’s. Can we talk over breakfast—10 am at The Lighthouse?
I realize I am still hungry after my failed attempt to make pancakes, so I cannot think of a better idea than to go to the Lighthouse for food, which will not be burnt. As it is only 9 o’clock, I still have some time to kill, so I make my way to the local market to buy the needed groceries. I cannot bear to waste a single day of summer, so I take my time walking down the dirt path to town. It is still pretty muddy from yesterday, but it doesn’t bother me. A little dirt never hurt. Even with the breeze, the summer air warms my browning skin. The sun is still low in the sky, so the heat is bearable. Being a Saturday, the market is crowded, mostly with moms in work out apparel, but I manage to navigate my way to the fruit stand. I stock up on watermelon cubes and buy my favorite iced tea. By the time I have accomplished all my errands, I’m running late to meet James.
“Hey, sorry I am late!” I say when I spot James at the corner table. I place my bag down by my feet and stretch out my back before pulling out my chair.
“No problem. I can wait for an angel.” There it is again, his flirtatious lines that always make me blush.
“So, what’s up?”
“Well a lot actually.” James kind of ignores my question and continues saying, “I ordered you your favorite. Double stacked pancakes with blueberries for the eyes, a cherry for the nose, strawberries for the lips, and my favorite, whipped cream hair,” he says smiling.
“Oh James you know me too well,” I say smiling right back. I bring up my ignored question once more, “What did you want to talk about?”
“You,” I must look confused because James says, “nothing bad or good, I just want to discuss something with you.”
“Okay…”
“So, I feel like I have been losing you lately. You always tell me everything, and now you are keeping things from me-”
“Whoa, wait! What have I been keeping from you?"
“Well, I talked to Sandy, and she is the one who told me about the possibility of you and Clayton going to the mixer together, which is crazy considering how he treated you! And then she proceeded to tell me about Peter!”
“Oh come on James! This only happened yesterday, it’s crazy for you to be this freaked out that I haven’t told you yet. I mean, leave it to Sandy to tell you everything that happened. You know how Sandy works! She is the influence behind all of those things. And of course she has to tell you every little thing about my love life. I know you two are concerned about the lack of love in my life, but give me a break. Also, Clayton and I were never a possibility; you know how I feel about him. That was just Sandy talking! And secondly, I was planning on telling you about Peter the second I saw you at Jennifer’s thing!”
“So you actually think this is Jennifer’s party? I would have told you about it when I saw you yesterday. Sandy asked Jennifer if she would have a party tonight, and when I asked Sandy why she did not just plan her own party, she said that it was a part of a plan to help you with your love life. She wanted Peter to meet everyone and you to see Clayton and the other guys again. She is trying to spice up your love life and make you have some fun!”
“Oh my god! I cannot believe her! She is not getting away with this” Now I’m laughing uncontrollably. Sandy likes to have control of my love life, and she is the master at deceiving me. “When I called her this morning, Sandy said Jennifer had called to tell her about the party, and then she had texted you for the details. Then she told me that you really wanted us to go, even though I don’t particularly care for Jennifer. What a clever girl.”
“She did it so you would have to go to the party, and then have to ‘suffer from the attention of hot guys.’” The way he says this tells me this is a direct quote from Sandy. This party would also allow me to find possible date options for the beach mixer. I could talk to the guys and explore my options. Also it would be a chance to get to know Peter better and talk to Clayton about last night! Of course Sandy did this! She didn’t want me to end up with a “single and alone forever” tattoo on my forehead! I think to myself. Now that I think about this, James probably had something to do with this as well, as Sandy did choose James’ girlfriend to have to party.
“So, why exactly did you get involved in Sandy’s diabolical plan?” I question, curious for the answer.
“What do you mean?”
“Oh come on James, Jennifer is your girlfriend, there is no way she would have gotten involved unless you said something!” James is now blushing, humiliated for being caught.
“Alright, fine! Sandy and I devised the plan together! But seriously, you need a flame in your love life, and I thought you could take this time to get to know Peter better. I don’t like Clayton and I think you should get away form him!”
Couldn’t be more true! I think to myself.
“So you aren’t actually mad at me then?” I ask.
“No, I can’t stay mad at you!” James is smiling and I cannot help but smile back. I had become so caught up in our discussion I never even started to eat the pancakes. By the time I take my first bite, the pancakes are cold and the fruit has become mushy and inedible. I’m not having any luck with pancakes this morning. I have a few bites, and then I decide to open the cubed watermelon. The ripe fruit’s juice is sweet and delightful. James and I finish up breakfast then James hastily heads out, as he has plans with Rick and George before the party tonight.
After a day of errands and eating, I head back to my house to pick up my car. I drive to Sandy’s house to pick her up on my way to Marley’s Boutique. We could walk, but it has gotten noticeable cooler and it’s a bit of a trek. I confront her about tonight’s party, and she admits to her plan, but I leave her alone, not caring right now.
We get to Marley’s around 5:15. I seem to be a beat behind this entire day, always a little later than hoped. I open the big, bright, blue, door and make my way into the shop, with Sandy trailing close behind me. I immediately feel overwhelmed by the numerous colors, styles, and patterns of each piece of clothing, but with Sandy at my side I begin to calm down.
A voice calls out my name, “Julia honey! How are you? Is that Sandy?…Hey honey!” Carly walks over to us. She is wearing a blue and white striped maxi dress with what appears to be bright red ballet flats, her arms are draped with clothing that needs to be replaced onto hangers, and she wears a smile of outer delight. She asks a colleague to put the clothes away then changes her footing, rocking slightly from left to right. She gives me a once up and down then says, “Let’s get to work!”
“Work it will be! She has guys to impress!” Sandy says, emphasizing the “s”.
“Oh! Multiple guys! What happened to that guy you had dinner with last night?” Carly says.
“Nothing! He is still in the picture, but Sandy thinks I have a chance with this other guy, Clayton, so she wants me to try and get both of them.” I proceed to tell her about Sandy’s diabolical plan to make me flirt it up with the guys tonight.
“Honey, that is a crazy plan! But, I must say, you could use some heat in your love life! Maybe this is what the doctor ordered!” Carly says. “But anyhoo, we should get back to the clothes. Big day today honey! Big day!”
Carly seats me in an overstuffed bright yellow armchair, and she and Sandy go off like a band of hunters attacking their prey. They rip clothes off their hangers, fling shoes into baskets, not even caring about size, grab make up off the shelves with determination in their eyes. Finally after a half-an-hour, and two magazines, they come over to me, baskets brimming with colorful patterns and styles. I’m required to try on the suits first. The styles vary from bandeau, extreme push up, and scandalous string bikini. In the end, I decide on three suits. One is pale blue with a triangle top that has layered ruffles on it. The second is dark purple with a bandeau style top designed to resemble a sweetheart neckline. The top of the suit is shaped like a bow tie in the way that it is smallest in the center and then fans out toward the sides. In the center, there is a bow the same deep purple as the rest of the suit. The third suit is my favorite. It is an underwire strapless suit, which basically outlines the shape of my boobs. The suit itself is variations of lime green and pink in an argyle pattern, with bigger diamonds than the traditional argyle look. The bottoms are bright pink, like Sandy’s suit.
After I have accomplished finding suits, my assignment is to find something for tonight. I quickly glance through everything Carly and Sandy have picked out for me, and I notice the romper right away. It is a gorgeous emerald green color, ruched at the waist with silk shorts at the bottom. It is perfect for tonight. I try it on with brown gladiator sandals and a white crocheted sweater.
“I know it’s just pizza, but I love this!” I am not usually this psyched about clothes, but I’m in love with how this looks. I feel really comfortable and confident.
“You look great honey!” says Carly.
“I love it!” Sandy agrees. “Definitely a good look for you!” Carly and Sandy sit in the two overstuffed armchairs, beaming up at me, their eyes twinkling. Suddenly, everyone is snapped out of the haze of admiration for my new look, when my phone buzzes by my feet. The caller ID flashes Peter’s name, I answer, haven forgotten that I am suppose to meet him here in 5 minutes.
“Hey Peter!” I say. As soon as I say his name, Sandy and Carly give me identical looks, their eyes shinning, wide opened, and popping out of their heads. They look at each other and giggle excitedly. Carly can act like such a teenager sometimes.
“Hey Julia. So sorry, but I am running a bit late. I, uh, have only been working in Edinburg for a few months, you know, as a serviceman, so I haven’t seen much of the town. I got a little turned around on my way in.” He gives a nervous laugh. “I’ll be at Marley’s in 15 minutes. Or at least that is what the man said when I asked him….sorry again.”
“Oh my god, I completely forgot. You live in Boston. Um, where are you?”
“By the petrol station on Halloway road.”
“Oh you aren’t too far. 15 minutes or so. Just take a left at the big supermarket. It is a little ways down from the station. Then follow that road until you see the beach. Stay on your right until you will see the restaurant, the Lighthouse. Marley’s is a little ways down the road from there.”
“Thanks Julia. I will text you when I reach the beach.”
“Alright. See you Peter.” As soon as I close the phone shut, Sandy and Carly come running over. They giddily ask what he said and want to know every detail of the conversation. When they realize he has just called to say he is lost, they lose their initial excitement but continue to smile and laugh like this is the happiest news they have ever heard.
“Alright hon! Your date has just left us enough time to do your make up and make you look perfect for tonight!” Carly says.
“Oh! This is the best part!” Sandy squeals.
“Come on guys! Do I really need to do make up? I am not so sure…” Before I can convince any one to not put make up on me, a demanding Sandy quickly cuts me off.
“You will put on make up and you will like it! Tonight is all about impressing these boys of yours!” she says. I let out an exaggerated breath, annoyed, but I decide that for tonight, I will let Sandy make the decisions. I am generally more in charge of my choices, but I have a feeling I won’t win any arguments tonight.
Carly moves quickly. Her hands move elegantly, painting my face, removing its blemishes, and highlighting my positive features. She is like a painter working on blank canvas, improving the stark white sheet with every stroke, making it something desirable and stunningly beautiful. Then her hands stop moving. Her lips uncurl from the tight, knotted position they were in, becoming a slight smile, and her eyes relax around the edges, as she takes in her masterpiece. Sandy is being awfully quiet, and for a moment I am worried there is something wrong, but her emerging grin allows my moment of doubt to pass. Carly gently hands me a mirror. I swallow and concentrate on my breathing as I bring the mirror up to my recreated face. As I take my face in, I gasp. My blue eyes are glowing with the help of subtle blue eye shadow outlining my eyes. All my blemishes have disappeared under a light layer of foundation, and my lips are shinning a light pink. I wear a gorgeous pale pink blush on my cheekbones, which accentuates them and makes my face appear thinner. I feel beautiful and before I can catch myself I say, “Please do this for the beach mixer!” I quickly cover my pink mouth in shame. I promised myself I would not succumb to “enhancing beauty” products, but I have just admitted that I believe I look beautiful and want to use them again. Sandy laughs saying, “Don’t worry about it Juls! Only two nights using make-up will not harm you! You truly do look beautiful and it is ok to think so! There is no harm in believing you’re pretty. You’re gorgeous Juls!” I do not want to, but I let a small grin come to my lips.
“Thanks Sandy. It means a lot! Now, it is your turn to become stunning!” Sandy has already come dressed, so Carly just has to do her make up. Watching Carly work is magical. She is a true artist, but instead of paints, she uses make-up. When Carly finishes, Sandy is even more stunning than usual. Carly has gone more dramatic with her, using a dark eye shadow to outline her brown eyes and what appears to be shadowy fuchsia colored rouge on her cheeks. Sandy’s lips are kept a shimmering natural color.
“You look stunning and even more beautiful then usual,” I say. “Carly you’re a true miracle worker! I cannot believe your skills with make-up!”
“Thanks hon! You two really do look beautiful! And I think your date will agree,” Carly says. Just as she says this, Peter walks through the door, beaming.
“Hey Julia and…Sorry I don’t think I have officially introduced myself. I am Peter,” he says to Sandy.
“I know, and I am Sandy!’ she says extending her hand. They shake hands, both of them smiling ecstatically.
“Well should we head out?” I say.
“Sounds good!” Sandy replies.
The drive to Jennifer’s is short, but all the same my stomach churns, ready to turn up my lunch. I am nervous about having to face Clayton again. When the car stops, I feel shaky. Peter notices and holds me steady, “Is everything alright? Did I do something?”
There he goes again, thinking it’s his fault, I think to myself.
“No I am fine, just a little woozy, it will past!”
“Okay.” Peter replies.
“Well I am going to go find Jeremy, so I will see you later Juls. Nice meeting you Peter!” Sandy says. She walks into the house, swaying her hips with confidence. Peter and I follow a little less confidently.
“I am nervous about meeting your friends. What are they going to think of me?” Peter questions.
“You will be fine. Just be your friendly self and keep the charm going.”
“Oh okay. I will. I am stronger knowing you’re with me.”
“Uh okay, thanks Peter.”
So weird! I think to myself.
By now we are in the mix of the crowd, mingling with the others. I look for James, but do not find him. I stay close to Peter, preparing myself for the encounter with Clayton. Peter is engaged in a conversation with Jennifer, and I am nodding pretending to listen as I tune out all the stupid things she is saying. I find my feet more fascinating then the conversation happening right now and just as I let myself become completely transfixed on my feet, someone grabs my waist, whisking me away from the conversation. At first I think it is James, but the smell of strong cologne tells me it is Clayton.
“I missed you babe,” he says seductively into my ear.
“Clayton stop! You can’t just grab people!”
“Come on! I just wanted to talk!”
“Well you could have politely asked to speak to me instead of grabbing me!”
“I’m sorry, okay! Let’s just forget about it and pick up where we left off,” he says smiling.
“It doesn’t work that way Clayton. I am here with Peter!”
“Come on, relax! Peter is talking to Jennifer right now. Before you know it, she will have him in her bed. Forget about him!”
“Stop it, stop it! Jennifer is with James! She would not betray him!”
“Really? Look over there!”
Jennifer has her arm outstretched, gently running her fingers over Peter’s biceps. Her head is back, blond hair flowing down her back, her mouth is opened, smiling and laughing. Peter is smiling right back, but his eyes are darting right and left.
“And look, your guy is smiling right back at her!” Clayton says.
“He is just being polite!” I sneer back.
“Oh come one Juls! Just forget about that dweeb. Come with me to the beach mixer. We can talk and get things back to the way they were at the end of last year!”
“Really! You just asked me to the mixer? You didn’t even try to make it special! You could have done it privately in a romantic setting, and then maybe I would consider your offer. But instead you whisk me away from my date, are rude, and then ask if I want to go to the mixer with you! Screw talking! Things at the end of the year were messed up and I don’t want to end up there again.”
“Juls! I am sorry! I promise a repeat of last year will not happen again! I took it too far! I’m sorry! Please can we talk! I am truly sorry!”
“No Clayton! You had your chance and you ruined it! You molested me Clayton! Do you know something? You don’t get another chance. You should learn some courtesy!”
“Please Julia, I was drunk! Let me talk to you!”
“You have had your talking time. I’m sorry, I am out of here!” I turn away quickly, leaving Clayton behind. Tears are streaming down my face, my vision blurring. I run out of the house, frantic, looking for someone, anyone to talk to, to tell the truth to. I spot Peter who is now running after me, a look of concern plastered on his face.
“Wait up Julia! Please!” I force my feet to stop. “What is wrong? Are you upset with me for flirting with that girl? I am so sorry! Please, can we talk about it?”
“That is not the issue! Not every problem I have is about you!” I snap.
“Oh, sorry! I didn’t mean to offend you! Let’s talk. I really like you. I don’t wanna lose you!” Peter says, his voice sounding smaller and more insecure.
“Please, stop with your self doubt! You aren’t going to lose me. The worst that happens is that our relationship doesn’t work out. Okay.”
“Oh. So we have a relationship. Okay.” As Peter says this, his voice becomes even more frightened sounding.
“Yes Peter! Gosh, are you that clueless! We are friends! I need to find James.” Peter grabs my hand and in a shaky voice he says, “I am going to go now. Seems like we could both use some space.”
“Fine!” I yell. Then I see him. James. He is talking to Jennifer, but his usual pleasant expression has left his face and there is no trace of it ever being there. I run to him. I feel burnt out, and all I need is someone to place arms around me. James sees me and reacts to my thoughts. His strong arms embrace me, holding me close.
“Julia.”
“James.”
He rocks me gently.
“James! Gosh! You yell at me for ‘getting involved’ with other guys but look at you, all cozy with Julia!” Jennifer storms off, clearly upset. James and I are now alone, outside the house on the patio steps.
“I’m sorry James.”
“It’s ok. Please, let’s not focus on me. How are you? What’s wrong?”
Suddenly I am blubbering again, shaking in his strong hold. I tell him everything about Clayton, not sparing a single detail, and when I finish, my shaking stops and James holds my gaze.
“Julia I am so sorry,” he says rocking me gently. “I am so sorry.” He repeats these words until my tears have dried.

I sit with my legs dangling over the boardwalk. Sandy is next to me. I have just told Sandy the truth. She is very quiet and very still then suddenly she bursts saying, “Why did you never tell me! This whole time I have been thinking you were just shy! But now I see the real reason behind your entire outlook on guys! I cannot believe you never told me about Clayton!”
“I’m sorry! I was embarrassed and confused and did not know who to turn to!”
“Julia, he sexually harassed you! It could have gotten out of control and been rape! What then, would you have said something?! You can’t keep these things from me or anyone!”
“I know! I am sorry. I was traumatized! I barely told my mom.”
Sandy is quiet for a while then she says, “I know. I am sorry for lashing out. I guess that was my way of reacting to the terrible things Clayton did to you. I am telling Jeremy, right now!”
“No please Sandy. Keep it quiet. I do not need to deal with drama right now!”
“Alright, fine, of course. I’ll keep it under the radar. Does anyone else know?”
“Yes, I told James last night.” The thought of James reminds me of Peter. I haven’t spoken to him since last night, and clearly we need to work some things out. “Oh! That reminds me! I need to speak to Peter. I don’t things are going to work out between us anymore.”
“Alright. Why don’t you call him?”
“No need, we are having lunch in a few minutes at the Lighthouse.”
“Okay! Should I meet you back at my house after your lunch?”
“Yah! That would be great!”
“Alright and thanks for telling me the truth Juls!”
“Thanks for listening!” I say back.
I meet Peter at the Lighthouse. He is smiling as if nothing happened last night. I can’t face him with a matching smile, as I don’t have the heart to lead him on.
“Hey Peter. We should talk.” I don’t even bother to sit down, knowing this date will be a short one.
“Alright, come sit!” Peter is cheery and acts completely unaware of what is about to come his way.
“I’ll make this short. We aren’t going to work out. You are a great guy and I know you’ll find someone who is right for you, but that girl is not me. I am sorry.” I turn to leave, unable to watch his face melt and his heart become crushed. Peter does not utter any other words besides one, “Why?” he calls out. And for some reason, his question lights up something inside of me, and for the first time I have an answer that I want everyone to hear.
I run out of the restaurant, my answer waiting on my lips. I pass through town and sprit down the dirt road that leads to my neighborhood. I ring the doorbell of the house. He answers and before he can utter a hello I say, “Because I am in love with you, James!” That is my answer. I can’t be with Peter because I love James. “The thing that lit up inside me when Peter asked the question ‘why,’ was my love for you! I love you James.” I stand on his front porch staring into his eyes, madly in love. But my trance is broken when a figure moves besides him. Jennifer emerges from the house, a look of outer disgust on her face. I crumple inside, beaten black and blue from disappointment and betrayal.
“Don’t worry Julia. He invited me here to end our relationship, not to mend it!” Jennifer says, storming out of the house.
Her words heal my wounds, and I look up at James hoping for a response to my words. Just as I bring my head up, his response comes. His lips gently press onto mine and for a moment I forget how to breathe. I want this kiss to last forever, but James pulls away.
“I love you too, Julia! I love you too!” He kisses me again, and I wrap my arms around his neck as I rise up to my toes and elongate my neck to reach his lips. Then I feel it: the spark glowing inside of me, warming my soul. I can feel the heat between us as our individual fires combine becoming one fantastic flame. This is all I have ever wanted, everything I have ever needed. I melt into the kiss as the tattoo erases from my forehead, no longer am I single and alone forever.