Till Death do us part | Teen Ink

Till Death do us part

April 25, 2011
By MiniAngel, sunderland, Other
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MiniAngel, Sunderland, Other
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Favorite Quote:
till death do us part


Author's note: NOTE: KING AURTHOR DOES NOT EXSIST!

Till Death Do Us Part


By K. Card
Age 13

They stand tall on the hills and they stand bold and brave in battle. They are the strong Knights of the Round Table.

So it was the time of King Arthur and his famous knights of the round table. The knights were noble, so noble in fact they would joust just to stay at the king’s side as a hero. Hidden in the village was a girl called Mayble, she was bold and strong. Her hopes and dreams were set on becoming a hero and soon a legend.

There was only one thing stopping her she was a woman. She couldn’t sign up for the sessions. It was forbidden for a woman to be a knight legend.

Some how she had to cover her rare beauty of a rose into a masculine figer. Suddenly she had an idea. She sprinted into her room and rubbed off her make up then put on her brothers clothes and shoes.

She sprinted out of the door to go and sign up. She ran out through the village and busy markets to get to the great stone castle. There stood a guard with a scroll for the sign up sheet. He stood there still and yet proud.

“Good sir may I sign up,” she said in a manly way.

“Would you like private tuition or,” he asked before he was rudely interrupted.

“Private Please,” she interrupted.

“Your lessons begin at 6AM tomorrow,” he explained.

“Thank thou,” she replied in a manly voice.

“Thou are welcome,” he answered.

She ran back down in to the village and the markets once again on the way home. When she got home she sang,” hurrah, horary, history has been made.”
As she was the first women to try out for the Knights of the Round Table. She ran to her room and pulled out a pad and feather. The pad had dairy written on the front. It was the daily record of everything she has done.

She wrote an entry in about to day.
It said:-

Dear dairy,


I have made my self as a man therefore I could win my dreams. I dressed up as my brother. The clothes seam to fade out my womanly figer into a strong manly look.









I got the knight tuition.




Write soon,
P.S. I got it.

Then she heard her mom come call in with her son. She heard a faint baby cry. Her 1 year old son was home. “Hi mom, my sugar plum,” she said as she ran down the stairs. She took her son in her arms. She gave him a big kiss on the cheek and cuddled him tight.

“Mom I have to tell you something,” she said.

“What,” her mother said calmly.

“Well I got the knights tuition,” Mayble said comfortably.

“Thou what,” her mother said shocked.

“I made myself look like a boy and got private sessions,” she explained.

“Alright,” her mother said worried.

Her mother began to get anxious and worried about Mayble. This knight stuff could be a new beginning or the end of her.

The next morning after sleeping like a baby, it was almost time for training so she got ready into her brothers clothes. It was dawn. The sun was barely up over the hills into the light blue sky.

“Huh,” she sighed with an elegant smile.

She grasped the buttons on her shirt that were near her heart and sighed once more. Soon she set off. She began to ask herself all these unanswerable questions about the future. The one final question spun in her head,’ Am I going to die.’ Tears filled her eyes at the thought. She hesitated. She began to try to convince her self to chase her dreams. People used to call her rose when they recognised her beauty. Her beauty was covered so they could not recognise her.

“You may pass,” the guard said respectively.

The gates opened making a loud screechy sound that seemed to vibrate the earth under her feet. The gates were so loud she thought it would be enough noise to wake the dead. She did not respond to the pain of her ears. After the pain had died down she scuttled in to begin her session. “Wow.” She accidentally spoke in her womanly voice. She gazed at the looked at the scenery that looked fake and yet was so real.

“Your tutor s waiting for you n dorm XXV. “ A voce said from behind her. She was scared. What f he heard?

“All right” said deeply trying to cover up the fact that she spoke like a woman.

She wondered in the halls to find her room. Her manly shoe clopped under her. Soon she came to her tutor’s dorm. She noticed and slowly walked in.

“Yee are late” shad her tutor. She recognised sir Lancelot.

“Accept my apology “she said.

Soon they began the lesson. He taught her many fighting techniques. She took yet all in very quickly. He was impressed. He left the room she wondered what for and Lancelot came back with King Arthur. She bowed down to show her respects. “Sire.” She greeted him. Her stood watching her and was impressed with her sport.

She had impressed Lancelot several times till king Arthur said” Join us tomorrow you must be knighted.”

Those words melted her heart with joy and the fact that she had won her dreams. Lancelot dismissed her.

He brushed his greasy brown hair with his fingers.

She ran home proud of her self and showing a graceful smile.
Tomorrow she would be the kingdoms first female knight.

The next morning she woke at dawn to the sound of an early bird postman knocking on the door. She pulled the wrinkled covers of her stomach and got up. She yawned. When she closed her mouth she slipped into her slippers and rushed down the stairs. She slowly opened the wooden door and said,” Anything for me.”

“Yes 3 and one for your brother oh and tell him congratulations he’s going to be an honourable knight,” he said.
She snatched the post and slammed the door.

“Mine, mine, mine, arh.”

She ran up stairs and dived onto her bed. She tore the red elegant ribbon from the rolled up scroll addressed to her brother. She read letter.

It read:


Dear John Richardson,




You are declared a knight on the 4th October. It will be held at the castle of Camelot at 4pm. Please note: you will be given an armour and weaponry. You will also be known as a sir.





King Arthur & Sir Lancelot.


“Oh gosh,” she said honoured and stunned.

Her mom came through the door. It was almost time to leave. She must have stared at this for the whole afternoon.

“Mom can you watch my son,” she asked.

“Yes, why the rush,” her mom said.

“They’re knighting me in an hour,” she explained.

“Oh okay,” her mother said, worried.

Mayble hurried up the stairs to get ready in her brothers clothes once again. Then left in a rush.

She had arrived at the castle. Trumpets played as she walked through the huge door.

The crowed roared as she walked down the silky red carpet. As she approached the king, the roaring sound was deafening loud.

When she got to the throne were the king was sitting proudly she slowly dropped to the floor. She was one knee with her head bowed down.

King Arthur placed a sword lightly twice on each shoulder and said,” Rise my knight, the peace of all mighty god will rest in your soul as you are a sir.”

The next day after the ceremony, she got up at the crack of dawn with her armour by her bed. She didn’t notice it before. Then she noticed some thing different there was a small note wrapped tightly to an arrow. She unravelled the bands with care.

It said:
AFTER CEREMONY NOTE
The day after the ceremony will be your trail at 3:00pm.
Win – you can join us for your first meeting.
Loose- you can not join us and you will be fired.

“After lunch I’ll head off,” she said to herself.

Later that day she put on her armour and left.

She had arrived at the castle of Camelot. Were she was given a horse as white as snow.

“Do you know how to ride a horse,” the guard asked. She replied with a short answer,” yes,” in a manly voice. She grabbed a spear from the wall and got on her horse.

“Your jester awaits you,” he said opening the gate.

The gates creaked as she rowed in holding Camelot’s pride in her heart. She was shaking with fear inside. When the gates closed behind her the crowed roared with delight. She caught a glimpse of her mother standing in the crowd holding the small hand of her son. Tears rolled down her cheeks under the helmet that lay heavily on her shoulders.

She laid her head onto the rusty metal back of the helmet and glared at her opponent. She saw a vision of her life slowly ending with a stab of a spear through the heart. Suddenly her horse moved towards a white line.

A bell rang. She found herself raising towards her opponent and getting close. She was scared, terrified even. Cold sweat ran down her forehead. She lifted her spear nervously and pointed it to the crowed on his side. It hit her opponent on the chest and dragged him clean of his horse.

She had won. The crowed roared with delight once more. Her mother and her son smiled but you could tell that they were relived.

“The winner shall join the rest of the knights at my side,” the king said as he rose from his throne.

The next day a note came through the door.
It said:


The Knights of the Round Table will hold a meeting at Camelot castle at 8pm. You are invited. Your
horse a waits out side.


p.s. 8pm
King Arthur


sir Lancelot

“Oh, my, aaaaaarrrrrgggghhhhhh,” she screamed with delight. She herd a loud ’nay’ from out side. She gazed out of the window as the horse fluttered its eye lashes at her. She stepped out side in just a night gown.


Without realising it she had stayed out side all day suddenly a shadow fell over her. She looked up and a night was sitting upon a horse.

“My lady will you please get your brother.” He said in a rough but proud way.

“Yes sir.” She went up the stair and rushed to get dressed. She was down and away in a flash. When they arrived in the meeting room they sat in a comfortable stool.

The king began the meeting,” the reason why I called you all in hither is to announce that I have chosen one of you to go on a grand mission and I have chosen… sir john Richardson.”

“What,” all the other knights said at once.

She sat there lost for words as the king dismissed them. All the others walked out and she sat there in stun silence and her mouth wide open in shock.

“Do you rise to the challenge,” he asked.

“That depends on what though is reqesting,”she remarked.

“St Columbia found a sea dragon up in loch ness and we have to slay him,” he requested.

She agreed and he thanked her. She bowed but a curl of her golden blonde hair fell out from hat. She was found out in trouble now.

He saw the curl and lifted off her hat. It revealed her true beauty.

“You’re a maid,” he said in shock. She looked down to the glossy floor twisted her toes on the floor as you would do when you stub down a cigarette. She turned away to face the window and using her reflection she put on her make up. Then she turned back and he mumbled something under his breath then went back to the conversation. “So john isn’t real.” He asked whilst looking into her glistening blue eyes. “Oh he is my brother.” She mumbled. She turned back to the window. He noticed how taken she was to the stars.

He grabbed her soft hands gently and dragged out and up to the roof. He kissed her under the moon light she pulled away and whispered in his ear,” I love you but I have to go.” He had a hold of her till she pulled away and scuttled away. She ran home. He watched her proudly then ran to his scribe’s room.

The scribe stood up and bowed then said,” Sire.”

“Write me a letter to declare my love to Mayble,” he ordered.
“Yes sire.” The scribe put pen to paper. He scribbled long in to the night just by the flicker of candle light. He sent it out as soon as he had finished. She picked it up from her door step the next morning.

She read it aloud to her mother. It said:




I took you on the roof at night.




Your kiss is so light.




I want you.




No matter what you do.




Will you marry me?

“Praise the lord, my daughter is going to marry the king,” her mother said with tear of joy filling her eyes and blurring her sight away.


She ran up to the castle and loudly knocked on the door. A servant answered the door and said,” Yes.”
“I’m here to see the king.”

“Are you the mystery girl?”
“Yes.”

She ran up the stair case and found him in the study. He turned around to see her out of breath. “Yes.” She gasped for air. He walked up to her and softly kissed her on the lips. They were going to be married soon.


They spent weeks planning the wedding and they decided to have a big white wedding. They wanted it to be soon so they made it in two days. That gave her two days to get a dress but she had her heart set on one already.

It had lace round the scuff of the skirt and for the sleeves. Glee filled there souls. Mayble could hear the sound of wedding bells ringing in her head.

The shoes she got were ivory white with a marble stone heart on her tip toes. The bracelet, necklace and ring had star cut diamonds on it.

Little did she know that the king was planning a crowning on the same day? The crown was made from a crust of gold embedded with jewelles.
Eventually the day had arrived, the cathedral bells were ringing and her friends and family were waiting as she stood nervously outside the cathedral doors. When she walked in everyone rose from their seats as her brother walked along side her to give her away.

“Shall we begin,” the priest asked.

“Yes,” they said at the same time.


“We are gathered here today to celebrate the love of Mayble Richardson and our beloved King Arthur and join them in the boundaries of love till death do them part now hear their vows.” The priest blabbed.

“I had two dreams and they seemed to collide and now they had to make me chose and I have chosen love,” Mayble said,” but it was worth the wait and I love you from the top of my heart to the tip of my shoe and I swear to you I will never love any one else.”

The women in their seats wept at the sight of happiness.

“I love you and if I could think of 1 billion ways to say it I would but there is only one way to say it, I love you.” The king said.

The women in their seats wept at the sight of happiness once again.

“Do you take each other,” the priest asked.

“We do,” they said.

“I now pronounce you king and queen,” the priest announced as King Arthur picked up his new wife and carried her out to the tune of bells ringing.

The next morning she awoke in the king’s room, naked in his bed. But she felt week and sick. Then her mother came in as soon as she tied her robe. “Darling your queen oh is this a bad time?” her mother asked. “No, No, it’s just I feel funny, like sick and week and heavy,” she explained,” like when I got pregnant with George.”

Her mother was shocked. “What are you going to tell Arthur,” her mother asked Mayble as she scrambled back under the quilt. “I don’t know but will thou go get him for me,” she asked. Her mother ran out to the banister and shouted to the first maid she could see walking below the stairs,” get the king the wife needs to see him urgently its and emergency.” The maid scuttled to the kings study and knocked on the door. “Come in,” he yelled. “Sir your wife wants to it’s an emergency.” The maid explained.



He ran up the staircase and stormed into the room then Mayble sat up and he murmured,” Honey what is the emergency?”

“Well I don’t know how to tell you this… but… I’m pregnant,” she said turning her head away in shame. He walked up to her and she looked into his eyes and said,” honey its ok, I was going to talk to you about this when you got up because once I get older I am going to need a Eyre, oh wait your pregnant and your pursuit is next week I’ll have to send some one else.”

They kissed and she slid under the quilt and drifted off to sleep. After that talk the used the next nine months to create a nursery there were 4 shelves for books, a huge box for toys an three cribs because in her 4th month of pregnancy she was bigger than you would be if you were carrying one child but she was carrying two. Twins.

It was soon the day of the birth. The doctor set up in the spare room and she gave birth there with her husband by her side. Her mother was in the nursery with her son. Waiting to be called in then soon a maid knocked on the door and entered. “We’re ready for you. “

Her mother walked into the room to see her daughter red and sweaty holding a little girl and Arthur holding a boy. “What are they called,” her mother asked. “Angel and… Thomas.” She answered.

The next day they woke up snow so they put on thick coats and went to the place gardens for a walk. She laid her head on his shoulder and sighed.

Watching her children grow up broke her heart a little, a new clothes or shoe size told her that one day they will be grown up and she would have to let them go.

The twins took there first steps at a Christmas party when they were hungry they got up and followed the waiters till they got food. Their parents rejoiced at the sight of them walking.

By the time their little girl was 4 she could read and Wright. Mayble had observed this and decided to tell the king.

“Darling,” she said softly.

“Yes, dear,” he replied.

“Our daughter can read and write no so I was thinking maybe… we could get her a dairy of her own,” she suggested.

“Honey that’s a great idea I’ll just get one from the scribe.” Arthur walked out.

He came back with leather covered hard back and said,” Will this do?”

“Yes I’ll take it to her she’s in the study.” She explained as she like he was retrieved the book from his hand

He pulled a face like he was impressed as Mayble ran to the study to give angel her book.

“What’s this,” Angel asked respectfully.

“It’s a dairy you record events, thoughts, feelings in this book.” Mayble said.

“Oh okay,” Angel said and got back to read a chunky copy of bible stories. Ever since she got that dairy she never lets go of it.

When Angel and her twin, Thomas turned ten they had a party with five friends from their private school. Angel sat in a corner reading while the others played hide and seek. A boy (one of her brothers guests) called Richard Darcy walked over to her. They really liked each other. He was a pleasant young man and she was a polite and pretty young woman. Her mother saw the love between them but didn’t approve of the flirty behaviour.

Mayble saw her daughter writing in her dairy after the party.

She wrote: Dear dairy,

I met this boy today called Richard. (I don’t know his surname). If I was older I would be in love with him but if my parents found out I would be in so much trouble.
From,

ANGEL
Mayble told her daughter that her friends were going home. Angel jumped out of her seat to go say her farewells. Angel had left her dairy open on the desk. Mayble she picked it up and read her entry.

Mayble was disgusted. She took the dairy to Arthur and pushed it to his chest and said,” Read this.” He placed the book on the top shelf of the book case and said,” that behaviour is scandalous she is not getting this back till she is fifteen.”

Angel spent weeks looking for her dairy but it was no were to be found. Little did she know that her parent had her dairy hidden only to be returned when she was fifteen? Then angel went to the study and stole two sheets of blot paper to write a letter to her love Richard.

She wrote-

Dear Richard,





When will I see you again? Please write back you are my first love. I have never felt this way about anyone before. I miss you. I drew and wrote about you in my dairy witch I seem to have misplaced.

I need to see you. I can’t sleep with out dreaming of you.

If you don’t feel the same ways don’t bother writing back to me.

All my love,


ANGEL

P.S. I love you!



When it came for the children to marry, the first child to marry was George.

Their eyes met across the room. Her eyes twinkled. He smiled. They walked to the centre of the dance floor and circled each other looking into each others eyes. He bowed and said,” want to dance, your grace, my humble mistress.”

“Yes please, my name is Lady Melissa.” She murmured.

They danced for most of the night. They never turned away from each other. Their eyes twinkled from the chandelier’s reflection of the candles. Mayble and King Arthur noticed the love between them. Now she had both of her sons in love.

“You look so beautiful, will you marry me?” George asked.

“Huh, oh, well, ah, yes,” she burbled.

He grew a smile and lifted her off her feet and kissed her softly. “Oh my,” she said putting her hand on her chest.


They danced the rest of the night away. The glistening of the marble stone floor and the tapping of her heals. They just gazed at each other with no care from anyone else.

Her dress bloomed like a flower swaying as they swayed in dance. The turning of other partners around them but they were acting like the floor was empty.

They could see the future filling each others eyes.

“Were is your farther?” he asked.

“With your parents,” she answered.

George wandered over to Sir David and tapped him politely on the shoulder. “Sir, may I have a word.”
They went into a room. To talk about an engagement agreement. Sir David agreed to the arrangement as he had tried to marry his daughter off but she kept refusing the offers. They went back to find Lady Melissa talking to George’s parents. They interrupted the conversation. To say,” it’s been approved her ladyship is to marry me.” George smiled at her and she smiled back with the twinkle of the stars in her eyes.

They took back to the dance floor.

“When shall we have the wedding,” she said.

“Well I think why wait we could have it tomorrow,” he said.

She was shocked by his forwardness. “How will we get all the stuff in time,” she asked. “I have a closet full of wedding stuff.”
He explained how his mother had bought wedding suits and dresses in case they were to marry too soon.

They spent all night picking out stuff for the wedding like a beautiful white dress with lace, a sapphire ring and big, whirly, white candles, a suit and a list of food and a theme for the ball afterwards. In the morning they had an early breakfast then wrote their vows and finally got ready.

Soon wedding bells were ringing and the groom was at the cathedral waiting for his beautiful bride to walk down the isle. Outside Lady Melissa stepped out of the carriage and her beautiful red curls blowing in the wind.

She walked down the isle as the wedding song was played on they organ. She smiled in the most elegant way. She was as beautiful as a rose. The one thing she wanted to say was ‘I’m going to die.’

“We’re gathered here today to join together Lady Melissa and Prince George in holy matrimony and bond them together in the boundaries of love, let the world and our holy farther accept the love of their life to come as they discover it together,” said the priest, “now on with the vows.”

“To this day I thought that I would never find a woman as beautiful as you to love, I saw you across the room and you took my breath away you are the most beautiful woman I have never felt this way and I have to say from my heart to the tip of my shoe, I LOVE YOU,” he said watching her cry with happiness.

“I never though that I was ever going to find love because… I’m ill and I don’t have a long life but I’m happy to spend the rest of that life with you. I love you too. I want to spend my last days with you … till death do us part,” she said.

“Do you take each other,” said the priest.

“We do.” They said together.

They kissed. Then it was time for the ball. They stood in the corner and talked for the first five dances. “What did you mean your going to die your as fit as a fiddle.”

“Thou know for a fact I’m ill but it’s not infectious so you are safe,” she explained.

“Care to dance,” he asked.

“Yes.”

They danced and then something strange happened to Melissa. She felt dizzy then went pale and then collapsed on the floor. “HELP,” he cried. Richard Darcy ran over from dancing with angel and helped carry her up stairs to George’s room.

She woke with fuzzy eye sight. She reached out for George’s hand he grabbed her hand and tried to comfort her. Soon there was a knock at the door. It was Richard and angel.

“Is she alright,” asked angel.

“Yes.” he said, “thank you Richard for helping.”

“As long as she is all right.” He said proudly. Angel smiled at him. “You’re a hero.” Angel looked at his proud face and he looked at her and smelled.

“I’m dieing honey I can only last a month even then I might not make it a few weeks,” she whispered as she gripped his shirt as if to show her clinging on to life. She began to cry. “This is our wedding night it is supposed to be the most magical evening, but I’m dieing and I’ve brought this dawn of sadness to the world.”

“No you have not I will remain by your side as I said for the rest of our lives till death do us part,” he said that and kept his promise he sat by her for her remaining days. He nursed her. He sat with her. He comforted her till the darkness of death came.

She had waited to have true love and she found it and died three weeks after her wedding. Her last words were, ‘I love you George.’

The councilor read her last will and testament it said…

‘I leave my riches and positions to be shared out between my family and my loving husband,
I wish to be buried in the hills of the country,
I also wish my husband can live the rest of his life in peace and happiness and re-marry.’

George locked himself in his room and stay there for there rest of the evening. He prayed, “Dear lord, how can I re-marry after finding my love and now she’s dead. I turn to your advice, argh men.”

The next one to marry was Angel.

She met Richard Darcy at the ball after Georges wedding. It started out as a normal evening she would be asked to dance by several handsome men and she would be pulled aside by her mother to see whether she had found a man to marry.

It was one of these conversations that she caught sight of the handsome Richard Darcy looking at her then she saw him walking over to her. She danced most of the night with Mr. Darcy until her brother’s wife collapsed on the dance floor. That night when angel went to bed she dreamed of Mr. Darcy. She awoke at midnight to a taping on the glass doors to the balcony. She got out of bed and saw Mr. Darcy standing out side. She asked him if he wanted to come in so he did.

“I thought you had left for home,” she muttered.
“No I stayed on your balcony to watch you sleep.” He explained, “I have a surprise for you, how about I tell you over dinner.”

“Ok,” they linked arms and walked to the dinning room. To their surprise their mother and farther were eating.

“Well hello Mr. Darcy, well you just can’t keep away from our daughter for one night, do I hear wedding bells soon.” Mayble said.

Arthur invited them to join them at the table. They had succulent roast beef with Yorkshire puddings and roast potatoes with a splash of gravy.

“The cook here is fantastic give her my compliments,” Richard murmured.

“So what was your surprise,” Angel asked.

“I still have your love letter,” he explained.

“What love letter,” she asked.

“The one you sent me when you were ten when you lost your dairy,” he explained looking confused.

“That was you?”

“YOU SENT HIM A LOVE LETTER AFTER WE PUNISHED YOU BY TAKING YOUR DAIRY BECAUSE YOU FELL IN LOVE TO EARLY.” Arthur shouted.

She ran out in tears in disgust that her parents would do such a thing. Richard looked at her parents in disgust and ran out after her. When he got to her room he knocked and went in. she lay across her bed in tears and then looked up at Richard.

“You can go home to get that letter and bring it in the morning.” He walked out after she told him that. She went out on to the balcony to get some fresh air and watch his carriage ride off into the distance. Then she heard a knock at her door and then she shouted, “Come in.” It was her farther she explained to him about how Richard had gone to get the letter and will return in the morning.

He apologised for taking her diary and gave her it back he left her alone to look through her lost memories then she looked at her last entry. There was her drawing and her writing about him. All she could think about how she had fell in love with the same man twice and how she forgot him because she was afraid of him not loving her back. Her eyes filled with tears and her heart filled with sorrow. She walked out to the balcony and looked out at the moonlight and the tears rolled down her cheeks sparkled.

Then she went to bed. Then that morning she woke to chatter coming from the study. She knocked on the study door and she heard a familiar voice telling her to come in. her loves. She went in and in side was her farther, Richard and her mother.

“Arh, dear, we were just discussing something, Richard would you leave us for a minute,” her farther blabbed. Richard walked out smiling at Angel. “My dear angel you are mine and your mother’s favourite child and now Mr. Darcy has asked for your hand… Would you like to give him you hand?” She sat silent and murmured, “Yes, I love him I go to a strange place when ever we kiss its under the moonlight a lake and a forest and a palace made of crystal. So yes I will give him my hand in marriage.”

Her farther dismissed her and she ran out hugged and kissed her husband to be. Then she dragged him to her room to talk wedding plans love letters and her dairy.

“So why did you not write back to me if you got my love letter?” Angel asked.

“I… I… wanted to but… if my parents found out I would have been punished so I did feel… like you did but…” he mumbled.

“Oh I’m sorry it’s just I was upset for years after that because I thought you… you,” she stuttered.

“You thought I didn’t love you,” he finished. She nodded. He looked into her eyes. She looked back to her diary. They both looked at it and he asked if she drew him. She answered with a yes.

She said that she wanted to have the wedding soon. He said, “ok, how about next Tuesday.”
She cried with happiness. He looked pleased and yet did not seem excited she looked at him in way as if to say what’s wrong or are you sure you want to marry me. He said, “I will need to talk to your farther.” He walked out and left the door open behind him but he closed her fathers study door.

She crept over to the thin wooden door and listened to what was being said. Suddenly all she heard was a large scream coming from her brother’s room she ran to investigate and behind her the door of the study was opened it was her twin brother Thomas. He lay on the floor dead.

She fell to the floor in tears by his body. “Papa,” she murmured, “what does this mean, you have no ere and I need to know what killed him.” Her farther gave no answer. She hated it when he was silent about important things.

The funeral was a small private ceremony because they would like to keep the word quiet. The king had arranged for Richard to become king.

Soon it was the day of the wedding. The day to forget all the bad things and move towards a happy future.

“We are gathered he today,” the priest said before he was interrupted.

“Can we skip to the vows?” Angel asked.

“Mr. Darcy, first.”

“My love for you is strong and I seem to have a need for your kiss every day. I love you. I need to be with you. I will slowly die with out you.” He said.

“The lady next.”

“I love you. My heart tells me I can’t be with out you. When you’re gone the loneliness will torture my soul.” She said.

“Do you take each other?”

“We do.”

They were married. That was it no turning back. Then suddenly her mother fell to the floor. “Mama,” angel cried. When they got home she was dieing she asked to be alone with her husband as she took her last breaths. Her heart was racing and she was gasping for breath. She grasped his shirt and gasped. Then she whispered, “Till death do us part.”



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This book has 1 comment.


on Apr. 26 2011 at 4:13 pm
SilentlyRising GOLD, Decatur, Georgia
13 articles 0 photos 100 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My pen is the barrel of the gun. Remind me which side you should be on."

I have a few tips for you.  First off, the use of "thou" and a mix of modern phrases (example: "Thou what," her mother said shocked.) makes the text come in through my mind as a little awkward.  I suggest just skip the "thou" and just use "you."  I haven't read many historical fiction stories set in that time period where they used "thou."

Second of all, there were a one or two errors in spelling and such.  "The clothes SEEM to fade out..."  and "dieing" is spelled "dying."

Finally, don't let my criticism stop you from being a writer.  Just writing to write makes good practice.  As the saying goes, "Practice makes perfect."  Maybe look at my stuff, too?  Write on!

 

-Dino