I had just started to build more traps for meat. The night seemed to go on forever here. I felt less lonely but not less scared. Fear was a important factor for survival I thought. It seemed as if those thoughts were not mine. They felt different and wrong in my memory and new in my body as if only one part of my past could be learned at a time. The hooded women was studying my actions with precise understanding as if she wanted to learn how to build the traps too. “Do you know how…” my voice was cut off by a snarl piercing the bitter air. Two glowing red eyes shone from the shadowed cover on the opposite side of the hearth. A wolfish animal no bigger than the a lion appeared with it’s silver fur glinting red in the fire-light. It was wounded. It hobbled towards me circling the fire to carefully plan a kill. The wandering woman had ran or left the camp and was somewhere in the woods. My head was spinning but more importantly my heart was breaking for this beast. I knew this was a test of will for my survival here. This creature was wild and free but also wounded and helpless. Just in case, I picked up a sharp thick branch good for stabbing and I tested it against a tree root poking out through the undergrowth. It was sturdy enough for protection and it wasn’t very likely to snap. The creature pounced forwards, cornering me and placing my back against a large oak tree’s trunk. I tried to distance myself and I began anticipating where it would strike but mostly hoping the animal would leave me and run away without bloodshed from either of us.

Then it struck. In a blur of grey fur and howling it pounced on me, the claws extended to sharp daggers in mid-air, the jaws of the beast extended with knives for teeth to rip flesh off prey. I impulsively thrust my spear forward to give a warning to beast but the creature was going forward too fast and the a single yelp escaped it’s muzzle before it rag-dolled and was dead in my arms. The poor creature was impaled onto the stick through the ribs of which it’s own blood was guzzling and spurting onto my hand that was covered in a thick crimson coating. My heart raced and my hands shook with terror but strangely though my mind was calm. It was as if I was sedating and numbing my present experiences. I found that even more scary but again my brain put those thoughts away. I stared at the body of the wolfish creature in horror and lay down next to the fire to rest. However not many minutes later my hunger and thirst took my moral-compass elsewhere. I stared at the carcass for seven minutes or so then I began to skewer the meat from the poor beast’s body to eat. Before I eat though I hiked for twenty minutes whilst the wandering woman watched and stoked the fire and kept the meat cooking with satisfying sizzles and pops echoing into night. Miraculously I found a hissing stream of water flowing narrowly from the rocky face of a mountainous cliff. I gathered the stream in my hands, inhaling huge gulps of the freezing water. My mouth went numb from the experience and I swear I heard my teeth pulsing as if trying to escape the torturous aqua. I gathered sharp stones and whittled hard wood into containers. It took hours and my hands were blistered and sore but when I finished I had three mid-size wooden buckets with fresh, clean mountain water. When I reached the camp once-more my associate was gone with nothing left but a barely lit fire of orange ash. There was no food and it look like the wanderer took everything from me. Anger boiled and brewed inside me. I yelled a sharp, deep bellow as the wind bombarded my magenta face. I found her though again. She came towards me as casually walking as if she didn’t do anything wrong. In disgust I dropped the water and it hissed over the fire, eliminating all warmth in the air. I grabbed her throat with one hand and a snarl appeared on my face. “Where is the food?” I growled. She looked terrified and utterly scared and in that I let her go she scuttled against a trunk of a large pine tree gasping to breath. To her side were three fresh rabbits swishing against her hips that must have been caught using the traps that her and I built together. 

My voice broke and I collapsed on the ground sobbing in disgust at my actions. I hurt my only known friend and ally, I thought. Then the woman look down on me but not with anger or fear, but with pity. She lifted her cloaked hood to reveal a beautiful young woman that could even be mistaken for a older girl. She looked no older than twenty-two, but her face was regal with otherworldly beauty. Her neck had crimson shades and from where I throttled her. I looked at her again but she just smiled warmly. A warm, summery smile that appeared on her face and pierced me and my very soul. She offered me a hand but I couldn’t tell what was going on. I looked at her in wonder and I took her hand, thoughts and feelings racing with utter confusion. Who was this woman? Why did she stay and help me? All of this resonated within me, as if a dormant volcano was slowly becoming a active one. I was interested and curious, but mostly I felt love towards this young lady. She helped me up and she immediately pulled me in closer to her. I didn’t resist hers as she caressed her hand across my neck sending electrifying goosebumps crawling down my onto my spine in shivers. 

I wrapped my hand around her neck breathing in her fresh evergreen scent. Then, carefully she brought me closer and kissed me. She inhaled me, held me, and broke me in so many ways. My chest felt like a faulty pinball machine that was smashing through my chest in hard bursts. When I let go of her I saw a singular tear run down her cheek. Her eyes were puffy and tinged red with emotion. I watched the tear trail down her neck and I reached for it and picked up the watery droplet. I held it in front of her on my index finger in confusion in the cold air. Then she looked at me, carefully this time and her faced hardened into a expression I had not yet seen before. She now had a dangerous and serious aura around her. She looked around at the trees as if expecting on of them to attack and impale us with their sharp branches. A deep wind whispered across her hazel hair which curled like a cocoon around me. Something is happening here, I thought urgently, something that was un-imaginably horrifying. The wind blocked my ears and I felt so dizzy I almost fell over onto the forest floor. The beautiful woman looked like she was about to scream. Just at it’s climax, it stopped. 

As quickly as the atmosphere changed at in the beginning it became calm and relaxed again. The atmosphere dissipated and the forceful wind turned into a simple low but piercingly cold breeze that caressed my cheeks, almost mockingly. Eventually my heart stopped beating itself into my ribcage. I could hear each breath I took more intently and my head cleared from the nausea and dizziness that was there only a few seconds before. The woman looked at me once hesitantly and quickly turned around to breath. A heavy exhale of air steamed from her mouth. Then she walked towards the campsite without a word, a whisper, or a sound as the dawn of a new day approached us. 

I ran towards the smoking, non-existent fire. The crunching and smacking of dry leaves broke under my bare, numb feet. I found her with the flint-rocks trying to spark a fire. She managed to create a well lit fire on her third try. She placed some of the dry branches and sticks carefully in the blazing hearth for fuel. She spoke something out loud but I couldn’t understand what she was saying. Then she spoke louder and I suddenly realised she was trying to talk to me in a different language. I looked at her in confusion and eventually she realised this as well. Her eyes widened in surprise and her head sunk with hopelessness. She seemed to have a profound realisation of what just happened and how it did as well. She raised her head again speaking the same un-intelligible language again with no hope in her voice. I gave her a look another look of confusion and depressed mood resonated in the air and throughout the hearth. The fire seemed to dim and sputter as if picking up on the wavelength of negative emotion. Eventually, after a few hours and using a lot of wild hand gestures I told the lady I was getting fresh fire-wood. I tried to ask her if she wanted to come but she couldn’t understand what I trying to say. I heaved myself onto my feet and collected a fairly large amount of tinder. My survival instincts told me to build something more permanent. My current thoughts had none of that in mind but soon enough my mind began to formulate a mental blueprint for a covered shelter. However by the end of the day I had barely enough wood to sustain the fire itself and I realised there was no way to build anything with the wood I had left over. Sadly I had no other options. 

The next few days were relatively un-eventful as they flew past. Since the the young woman and I could not verbally communicate we usually had separated our jobs. However, one night we had a minor miracle and somehow she finally told me her name: Lyra. I was hoping for more information about her but it seemed all she could give me was already given. Every day Lyra would stoke and fuel the fire and check the traps for food whilst I gathered as much wood, tinder, and logs that I could carry. After three days of this I found a solution to my problem. I decided to make a cart as a carrier for the wood. 

First I made a simple hatchet from fur, wood, and a thick, sturdy, stone I found with the glint of iron ore sparkling from the surface. It took days of  hard excruciating work but I managed to complete my rickety wooden cart. It turn out to be our saviour. After four days Lyra had stocked up food for five days in advance. I had quadrupled the amount of wood I collect without the cart and after four days I managed to construct a 

medium-size hut that encircled our camp with wooden walls. I also contracted ceiling with a hole in the roof for a central fire to release the smoke that curled off into the air. I even made beds and extra clothes from the furs found in our bated traps. Finally I made a bone-toothed spear just in case conflict arose or we were attacked. 

I never travelled far but I did become more curious about the outside of the world beyond the forest. Eventually I spotted a fiery light far in the distance when I near one of traps to replace the bait. The light came closer and four figures two bigger than the rest appeared, cautiously from the shadows. They looked at me curiously and to my surprise they spoke a language I could understand. “Do you live here” the older, father-like figure said in a gruff but physically beaten voice. I looked at the family and sighed. “Yes, come with me for shelter.” I said. I noticed the condition of the family: clear and utter exhaustion. One little boy and a very small girl was leaning against their parents. The mother and father look broken and un-imaginably tired. They wouldn’t survive without my help, I thought. When we reached the small heated shelter Lyra looked the family she looked blankly as we enter then nodded towards me in apparent understanding. We set the four up in the corner area of the hut near the warm fire. I asked how long they would be staying. 

The man looked so hopeful and thankful before but he now responded with clear terror and fear in his eyes. “It’s so dangerous out there. We needed refuge. Help us please. Everyone is dead. ” he stuttered through each of the sentence his jaw bobbing up and down in shivers and fingers were now shaking as well. I finally realised the seriousness of the situation and immediately set the family up with cooked meat and edible fresh berries. They devoured the food with hunger and I ran a mental calculation of the supplies needed for all of us to survive. Eventually I knew what was needed if they were to stay here with Lyra and I. “You can stay but you need to help around and do your part.” I said. I tried to convey the message with a hopeful but stern and serious tone. The family looked mesmerised with relief and all of them nodded ecstatically with boundless enthusiasm and their heads sunk low with gratitude. The two children waddled over with smiles and said gave me a metal top which was their toy. 

Soon enough the night faded away and a new day approached. I insisted that the family could take a rest on today’s work but they insisted and got right into it. By mid-afternoon we had tripled our current stock on food and had at five huge piles of logs and branches. We then, all began to build a hut and by midnight their new home stood upright beside the identical to mine. 

The two children ran delighted into their new home and the tired but better parents trailed after them with joyful, tired expressions. They continued to work and even the ten-year old boy began to help his parents. I smiled and they smiled back. The food storage area in my hut had to be redesigned to hold more meat and berries for storage. We began to build even more huts and the family said they could bring good, hardworking people that were their friends to the camp and over four weeks I built ten more huts with the help of everyone. They filled up surprisingly fast and the people who lived there started to become acquainted and friendly towards one another . By the time the twelfth and the last hut had filled up we had a small functioning society. The  huts gradually became bigger and our community became village. One night, however, something horrible broke out. 

A huge fire blazed across the wooden huts. It was unclear which hut had started the rising flames to burn and spread and soon three of the twelve huts burned to ash along with most of their residents. The family I first took care of perished in the fire and all four of them died terribly. By the time someone used the water supply to smother the flames seven villagers and good-hearted, hard-working people had been killed and burnt to crisp husks. The scent of burnt flesh made me gag and choke as the blackened body that were once my friends and family were carried a mile down the hill to be buried. 

I felt despair and hopelessness burrow itself into my soul but I also knew I couldn’t allow the emotion to take over. I had a village with more families and people, just like the seven who died, to care about. Later in the day Lyra leant against me, her head on my shoulder that night singing a melody that I couldn’t possibly understand. When the sun set I was looking up to the stars as they shone like diamonds in a pool of ink darkness. I didn’t know how she knew it as well but I knew that she was here with me for a reason and I was sure she knew that as well. As the sun approached us in the morning I found myself sprawled on the grassy plain that was a rare sun-touched field of grass surrounded by the dark, gloomy forest. Lyra’s limp hand lay across my heaving chest and she curled herself in blanketed furs purring with each breath she took. She look peaceful and relaxed but more happy than I’d ever seen her. I’d found Lyra and helped her. I’d hurt her and I’d broken a part of myself in the process. I realised that I nursed her back to health physically but it seemed she healed me in a way no one else could. I cared for her more than the other villagers in a way I could quite call love. I felt love for her, of course, but I also felt something I couldn’t properly describe. 

I began to lay back on the soft furs to relax and let-go when she opened her dark hazel eyes to face me. She smiled and I took her in my arms. The night before had been so hard and so many suffered. She held and comforted me as I did to her before. I felt changed and more ready than ever before. Before the sun could fully rise we headed back to our hut which had been upgraded to a two storey lodge. On the way back though I found four or five traps for animals that were smash to pieces. They trailed off into a deeper part of the woods but I decided I would check it out later. We headed back to the village and I exchanged my condolences with the people who lost loved ones of their’s. 

By mid-afternoon the whole village was more-or-less back to working order. In that time I followed the trail of mangled traps with my bone-spear to a large dead beast who looked very deadly when alive. Behind the beast a blur of movement whisked past my sight and a weathered old women with wrinkles covering her face. She looked hurt and I saw the beast had wounded her when is was still alive. I helped her up and brought out some supplies to cover the bleeding. I took her to the village and nursed her back to health. After about half a day she spoke. “Let me help you, please.” she said. She slowly brought out a wrinkled map that had written words and coordinates on them. She also brought out a metal disc which I found out was a compass. She pressed both of them in my palms and closed my fingers over the objects. I also saw that she was struggling with the wound and I realised that the wound must be infected or poisoned. I knew there was nothing to do. We had no medicine or supplies to help her. 

After four hours of heavy and laboured breaths she passed away softly in the night. After I buried her I spent time studying the map and compass she gifted to me. The compass fairly simple and easy to use but the map was riddled and marked with caves-like drawing and labelled places like a ‘abandoned town’ and even a ‘deserted city’. There was a whole new world to explore right beneath my fingertips. My heart raced in excitement. I gathered supplies that night immediately and rested until dawn to explore the new world that awaited me… 

As the sun rose I began to take stock of my supplies once more. A few villagers waved towards and asked for jobs to do. I told one villager named James what to do whilst I was away. He stone-jawed, expressionless and ripped with muscular cannon-like arms. Not surprisingly, he was also best logger we had in the village so I asked him to assign the daily jobs around to the rest all of the villagers. He nodded once and with without a word or whisper, he set himself to the task. I armed myself with a iron sword that I borrowed gratefully from one of the villager’s named Bobby. I was surprised he even had one because he was so huge he could’ve used the sword as a dagger. He was ripped with muscles and blue veins. 

I supplied myself with thirty days of water and food. I wore hide/leather armour with my sharp sword sparkling in the beautiful sunrise. I covered myself deeply inside the furs but after a few minutes of trekking with my rickety, wooden cart, I took the hot furs away and took a break, basking in a cloven field of long, hissing grass, hypnotically swaying back and forth. After a hour to rest and re-energise, I trekked through the itchy, green, maze. By the time I reached a clearing I was almost too tired to continue…

Then I saw the view ahead. My vision broke into the distance where hundreds of faded, dark roads swivelled and swirled like snakes overlapping each other. Dried mud, dirt, and dust encrusted and covered each road in rough bumps and lumps of clay. It looked as if the Earth itself, was reclaiming the lost land, dragging it back into itself to erase the existence of this pathway to freedom. I pondered the thought of the earthen ground sprouting tendrils of rock like the black, shadowy room had. The thought made me shiver despite the sweat dripping and coating my forehead and body. Despite the road’s beauty and opportunities they were the least interesting and exhilarating thing on the vast dusty terrain. 

Before me blared vast, clay-hued cities of which had broken, shattered skyscrapers tower through the horizon. There were towns that from the distance looked seemingly empty. A sharp tug caught my chest and I realised my thoughts themselves were fighting each other. I thought of danger and death that awaited me but my survival instincts were overrun by feelings of wonder, curiosity, and a passion to explore the forgotten land that stretched beyond my view of my sight. I began to trek down towards the road but I realised my mistake. I was on a steep cliff-like hill. There was no way to cross it without a bridge or ladder of a sort. My mind raced to formulate a plan but my internal instincts seemed to reject my request too explore. After hours of thinking, breathing heavily frustrated breaths in puffs, the Sun started to set and my hope did too. I waited expecting nothing to come and I began to pack up my supplies and head back to the village. 

I heard a rustle of dry leaves as something seemed to approach me. I quickly covered my supply-filled trolley in a leafy, camouflage netting made of sticks, fresh leaves, and a miraculous green dye one that a older lady named Sophia had luckily brought from where she supposedly came from. I remembered I had tried to ask her where she was from before to see if I could savage some supplies or trade in the settlement. The woman seemed distant and closed-off as soon I mentioned her past home. She then surprisingly and softly spoke in almost un-recognisable wisp of speech. “It was destroyed, raided, and everyone died.” she spoke in mutters. Then somehow even quieter she whispered once more “…but not me. I ran before it started. I saw the people who did it. Five large men, three women, and even two smaller children no more than ten years old”. 

That line itself left me speechless but my curiosity took over and I asked her why they did it. I asked her why they did it and she responded louder almost with a tone of pity at my expense. “You killed them, I killed them, we killed both them. We are them and they are us. Does it matter who kills. We survive, we die, repeat. They survive, they die, repeat. They do not murder they kill for a purpose. They killed my son and my husband and they killed my dearest friends. They burned my village to the ground. This place might last longer in separation but it will taste blood nevertheless”. My face must have looked visibly shocked because she continued in sequence as if this talk was done many times before. “There is no murder in this world. There is no laws, no truths, and definitely and most importantly no mercy. We are as much horrible, and ‘evil’ as they are. Only when there are no villages to burn, lives to take, and torches to light will our world be at peace once more”… 

I remember that after that I walked away silently fuming at this woman’s perspective on life, her cynical, cruel, and blunt speech shocked and broke something inside of me. My chest heaved and it felt as if something was loose inside my thoughts infecting all my hope and sucking it into oblivion. It took two full days of hard work to get those thoughts out of my head. When the village burned, the words of the woman reverberated through my mind ringing with spine-chilled proof as I found her blackened body curled against the wall as if accepting her fiery fate. 

My head spun in fear as I relived the experience in my hidden state behind a clump of bushes with frame of faded ruby tinted on each leaf. I shivered in anticipation as the figure came into the light of the setting sun. He looked like a soldier. He was no more than thirty but he was armed to the brim. He had a long barrelled weapon, a knife, and two greyish green orbs with clips caught on his belt. His face was expressionless with no sign of fear or panic in his eyes. I immediately spotted he was hurt… badly. His left arm which was covered previously was bent in a grotesque L shape and his side was slick with blood. After five minutes of pure silence I slowly worked myself behind the figure. His camouflage coat had a name embroidered gold-thread: Lt. Lennik. My mind was racing with fear. I needed a plan but my body seemed to act on instinct as I crept forward toward the man. My mind clicked with understanding as I realised the long-barrelled weapon he carried was a gun, a M16 rifle. I waited and then something to happen, anything at all. In a spastic burst on energy my limbs and body rushed towards the warrior without a second to spare. It felt as if molten iron had burned my arms and legs wrestled them into submission. I felt like my legs and arms were being torn off my torso, tendons snapping, flesh ripping. It wasn’t a clumsy act of endurance however. To my shock the straining against this alien force did nothing to slow my movements as my legs, arms, and body raced toward the figure raced with incredible, blinding speed. I grabbed his shiny, steel dagger. Before he had a chance to fully turn around and to absolute my horror as well, my arm swung wildly as I cried out a piercing desperate cry and I plunged the sharp, shard of metal edge into the man’s head. The knife slide smoothly into his skull. I collapsed shivering as the alien energy that made me pursue and commit this violent act drain away and carefully I sunk into the earth's unforgiving embrace. 

I dreamt of sinking into the earth. It’s tendrils closing around by broken, huddled body. My soul dragged through the infinite crust of dirt and rock. In the distance… was that light? Am I dead? I wondered briefly. My heart sped as I approached the blinding, deafening supernova. It’s purifying waves caressed my broken body in tendrils of pure bright light. As it cocooned around me I closed my eyes embracing it’s burning rays. I felt my body burn to dust and bone in pure and utter pain blinding pain… then I woke up.