October

I heard crying coming from the restroom I wondered who it was as I knocked on the door I heard your voice and immediately I rushed in:

“ Mom are you okay what’s wrong what happened “
“ Juliette I cant get up “ “here ill help you “
“ No I am in pain, I can’t stand up just go get grandma” not leaving her side I shouted
“ GRANDMA”

“ Go call 911 Juliette hurry” I called my mom went in the ambulance and we followed her in the car my grandma praying, “ Please god let her be ok please por favor” repeatedly said it over and over again as we drove there. We finally got there and they put her in the emergency room immediately did an x-ray on her and a cat scan and saw the problem but was it really the problem?

November

We started noticing changes you were getting skinnier. Hardly being able to contain food in your system we noticed you getting weaker when you should have been getting stronger. We thought what was going on, when the doctor said, “ the surgery was a success, she will be okay”. “ Why would he lie?"

December

You’ve lost so much weight, now weighing almost half the size of me. You’re feeling so unconfident and disgusted about your body.

You used to say, “I'm beautiful” and “ I love myself.” Now you say, “ i hate my body.” Now you can't even stand to look at yourself in the mirror without crying. I would tell you you're still beautiful but you never believed me. As days went on you got skinnier. You got weaker, to the point where you couldn't walk on your own. You were frustrated because you couldn't do anything. You said “i'm worthless.” That wasn't true.

January

Day after day weekly check-ins, in home nurses coming every Tuesday and Thursday. Spending nights in the hospital 1,2,3 even 4 weeks in that cold 60-degree hospital room. Every 30 minutes nurses would come check in not getting any type of sleep. Constantly poking you, you would say   “ Juliette hold my hand.“ I would say, “Of course."

February

I was only 14 it was suppose to be a normal day but what is it? No one knew it would be the day my mom passes away it didn't seem real maybe because I wanted it to be a joke but the sad part about it was that it wasn't a joke no matter how much I pleaded for it to be it happen so fast from one minute to another she was gone in a blink of an eye she took a part of me that I won't get back until the day we reunite