Keeping up with my classes was difficult for me.  I was falling behind.

Most of my problems in school came from how I would pretend to do my work. For me, class was a performance.  I was too embarrassed to call out for help. Others would think I was too stupid because I wasn't able to keep up with my work.   I did not want to put up with those words.

I felt like if I pretended to be invisible, my teacher wouldn't call on me.  If she didn't call on me, I was going to be fine. As a student, to be invisible you kind of have to be low key.  So I would be quiet and make an effort to not be known.  I wasn't doing homework, but I would get my work done by copying it from someone else. However, when it came time to take quizzes and tests, I knew I was in trouble. I was the only one lost and confused.  My cover was blown.

I started to think that school wasn't just about learning; I was thinking school was just about passing. I would tell myself that I didn't have to learn the material as long as I could copy someone else's work and get credit for it.  That would be okay. I got so used to it, I wasn't able to do my work at all. The reason why was because I never paid attention, so there was no way I knew what the lesson was about.

I was so behind I don't think I was ever going to catch up with the others. My teacher would say something like, "Thursday I will be collecting the chapter 2 worksheets."   I would have no idea what worksheet that was. The teacher would say that things were due at certain days and my mind would go blank because I was so lost. I had to do something about it.

In whatever way, reality started reaching me. I knew I had to make a change. I realized that pretending to do my work was actually harder than actually doing my work. Suddenly I started looking inside my backpack for old assignments anything I could find to turn in for partial credit. My only hope was that my teacher would realize that I care and I wanted her to accept my work. I waited until the last minute I shouldn't of done that it only made things worse for me. In the back of my mind i would only think that it's always late than never. Suddenly my assignments were getting turned in. After I caught myself back on track. I felt relief i was proud of myself.