I am lonely and I am ashamed. Life has done me wrong; I have lots to feel sad about. Of course I blame myself, why wouldn't I? I'm told that it's not my fault, that I was born this way, but sometimes it doesn't feel as such.

I never wanted what I was handed, I was only a kid. At six years old there is only so much one can hope for. I believe I hoped for too much. Hope let me down. It could not save me from the pain and abuse. Hope let me down. How would it have been able to keep me strong? I gave up. On my hope, my faith, that things would get better. Hope let me down.