Death is something that we never really think about until it actually happens.  I’ve tried to put myself in the mindset of thinking of what would happen if someone close to me had died, but none of those thoughts came close to the actual pain of the real thing. No matter how “prepared” you think you are for it to happen, you will sooner or later figure out that you never really were at all and you never will be.
Death is one of life’s greatest mysteries. We’ve mastered the concept of life, but no one has yet to master why some deaths happen when they do, and what even comes after it. We are just left with our thoughts to try and tie together an image of what it could possibly be that lies after. Some believe that our soul stops existing completely, while others think that we go to either heaven or hell. Regardless of what you believe, there really is no right answer considering we will never know until it actually happens to ourselves.
Over the course of 2015, I’ve had three people close to me whom have passed away. This has all taken place in the first three months of the new year. Two of which had taken place in the same month. All had been so unexpected, and each of them hadn’t even made me the slightest more prepared for the next.
The first of which, had happened on the second day of the new year, it was my 22 year old friend Cody who suffered a tragic death at a concert. I had only seen him a few days prior to the death at a party that he had thrown for Christmas. As I left that night, I had no idea that it would have been the last time that I would see him. I hadn’t even thought about how much it had truly meant when he told my sister and I to drive home safely. I left with my mind fully focused on the fact that I had been sick, and completely brushed off that good bye.
The same experience had happened with my pop-pop, except this death had been from old age. I’ll never forget that last week in January. All I could speak about that entire year leading up to my birthday was how much fun I was going to have that day. Little did I know the complete morbid irony of that, considering my birthday had then been spent at my pop-pops funeral.  On that day, what I had wished for all year had completely changed. I no longer wished for the best party ever spent with my closest friends, but now I could only focus on how much I wanted my pop-pop back. I think the biggest thing I was remorseful about was the fact that he had lived across the street from me my entire life, yet I had brushed it off so much recently when I could have just took a few minutes out of my day and spent it with him.
Personally, as I’ve dealt with death, I believe the hardest thing to wrap your mind around is the fact that you are never going to see that person again. It’s like that person was there one day, and then they are gone the next. It’s hard to even think about how someone could possibly just disappear from conscious existence in the blink of an eye. You are just left with memories with this person who isn’t even knowingly aware that they had happened. These now one sided memories can lead to feelings of remorse as to why you hadn’t made more, or even why you had one of those bad memories with that person.
One of the things I’ve noticed with death is that losing someone so close typically ends up bringing people close to that person together. And in a way, I believe that is a blessing in its own. Its like for that short period of time, everyone mourns together and by doing so, it brings back happy memories and photos that you forgot even existed. It’s so unfortunate to realize that something so tragic must happen in order for everyone to be so close and appreciative of one another for a few moments.
I believe the most important lesson that death can teach us is to cherish those around you because it doesn’t just stop with one. You never know when it’ll happen to someone you love so you must make the most of every second with that person;  let them know how much you love them so you aren’t left with an unfillable void.