Someone I love has gone away and life is not the same. The greatest gift anyone could give is to speak their name. It’s hard to lose the ones that were the closest and the ones you loved the most. Not even a year ago I lost an amazing friend; he committed suicide because the girl he was in love and hoped to marry one day decided it was time to move on and find someone else. He was kind, generous and never stopped doing what he loved the most; helping others. He was the one to always brighten your day when it seemed as if nothing possibly could. Though he is gone and in a far better place he will never be forgot.
They say there is always a reason for something but no reason is ever good enough to cause a person to commit suicide. They say in time pain will heal but neither time nor the reasons could ever change the way I feel. I can’t seem to forget the day I got that phone call from his mother; the sorrow in her voice led me to believe something terrible had happened. I never in a million years would have thought it would be my dear friend. Unfortunately, it was. The pain I felt was unbearable and almost felt as if someone had tooken my heart right out of my chest. The phone came out of my hand and I instantly fell to my knees, crying until no more tears would fall. The one who was always there for me had passed away and left me behind.
The anger inside grew more and more the moment I learned the truth behind his death. Young nineteen year old boy who hadn’t even had the chance to live his life yet, committed suicide due to the young girl he was previously dating. He begged for her love and she refused to give it back to him. He tried convincing her that if she wouldn’t, he would, in fact, be gone, gone forever. Continuously laughing at the tears rolling down his face she walked away, walked away having no idea what his intentions were, nor that would be the last day she would ever see him again.
I remember it like it was yesterday walking into his mother’s house with the family gathered around. Silence and a few tears that fell from the cheeks was all that was heard. In the distance was his mother with a paper wrapped in her hand; his suicide note, found a few hours after finding his lifeless body. No mother should ever have to go through the pain of finding her son passed away. Still till this day I pray for that family and even catch myself at times speaking to him as if he was still here, right by my side. For no one knows the heartache that lies behind my smiles. No one knows how many times I have broken down and cried. Though he is wonderful to think about, it is much harder to be without him.