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I want to fall asleep...
I see you then you're gone. How can I miss her...I just saw her like two hours ago. I lay in bed. I'm so exhausted yet I can't sleep. Why? Why can't I just drift off into another place, where I don't have any true worries. Maybe the strange happenings in my head...but it's not realistic. I can run away and not care because I'm not really there.
It's you. It's because without you in my sight I'm anything but myself. You're like an angel to me. I always want you near me or else I start to go insane. It can take only seconds without your presence for me to start losing my sanity. How could I love a person this much? It's not like that. I mean it's like you're my sister...but would I even have this much love for someone who really was my sister? I love you more than I can even begin to describe. You're the only one who I really trust. The only one who is ever really there for me. You are my best friend. You are my heart. Without your heart beating, you can't live.
So I can't fall asleep. After these last two days of hectic life...I'm so tired. But I can't sleep. I start to realize why. I realize it's because you aren't here. I realize it's because sometimes...I just wish it could be the way I want. I wanna spend time with you. I wanna be able to see you whenever I want. Talk to you whenever I want. And hug you as long as I want. But I can't. So I start to cry. One tear sheds down my face...and then I can't stop.
You're my light, and without light the day becomes dark. I wish I could stop crying. I want to fall asleep. Then at least time will speed up and I'll be able to see you again. But until then I'll drive myself insane. I'll keep my eyes open until finally they're too burned out to cry anymore and they finally close.
Some would call me obsessed. But..Sister, I love you. Your life to me is like a colorful piece of art work I just want to look at all day. You shine and shine and shine. You brighten up peoples day. But, sometimes I want to be in the spotlight. I want the light to shine on me. My days have been dark. On the days I see you the weather is nice. But right when you leave a storm comes along. I just want you to be here. I just wanna hug you.
I don't wanna cry anymore. I wan't to fall asleep.
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