All my life, I have always been the kid that wanted to get straight A’s. If I didn't, then  I would be hard on myself and think less of myself; due to my surroundings, this caused me to abandon my efforts and become heavily influenced by the opinions of others. This shift negatively impacted my education. Through the course of four years, I have been guided by hard mistakes, but with the help of a special person in my life, I have learned that I shouldn't let anyone else dictate my actions.  It all started in the 7th grade when I walked into room 208. I was one of the last students to walk into the room. Almost every single seat was taken. I scanned to see if any seats were available, and the only seat that was available was next to a girl that seemed reserved and shy. We rarely ever talked, but whenever our teacher assigned us to do partner work, we were both always the last two who never had a partner. In a way, it comforted me that she also didn't have a partner because I didn't feel as alone. Over time, we got really close and she introduced me to some of her other friends. When I first met them, I thought they were really mean, and they were the complete opposite of how she interacted with me. They’d constantly make fun of random students for no reason. Or they would even try to bring each other down because they wanted to feel like they were better than everyone in their group.  But soon, I realized that she was actually exactly like them. 

I always tagged along with her and her friends because they were really my only friends. But whenever I would hang out with them, I always felt out of place. All they ever cared about was what people were saying about them and just wanting to fight anyone who did say “bad” things about them. They did absolutely terribly in school, and for some reason, I wanted to be just like them. I just wanted to feel wanted, so I decided to be just like them. I stopped trying in

school and I got myself involved in their petty drama. My grades and attitude were completely altered. Every school year I did worse and worse to the point that teachers kept telling me if I didn't get my act together, my GPA would be too low to even go to college. Even then, I didn't care because I had already dug myself too deep of hole that even trying to get out would be nearly impossible. But then  I met a special someone who made me realize that I should care. He showed me how I shouldn't try to fit in or be something that I wasn't and that I should be my authentic self, but most importantly, he showed me how to love myself. I remember us having a conversation and him saying, “I don't know why you let people decide for you on who to be. You’re perfect being just you.” I had never heard anyone say that to me in my life, so that really made me want to change.

I'm genuinely proud of myself for not quitting and for constantly pushing the obstacles life threw at me. And I'm glad I met my soulmate when I did. It’s been a tough couple of years trying to undo all the mistakes I've made in my past, but thankfully, I've finally returned to my roots.