As I get ready to enter the plane for France, I start to realize that I have lost someone. Someone I wanted to know better. Someone I cared about. Someone who was a part of my family. Two days before, we received an unfortunate message about my aunt Cecile who had left us that day. I didn't have the courage to believe it was true. I felt like I was in a never ending nightmare, until I sat in my plane seat and became conscious that it wasn't a nightmare, but a unfaceable reality. I was shocked on how a woman in her fifties could be gone so quickly. I still couldn't understand how it was possible for a person to disappear in a heartbeat. It’s true that she was suffering from a sickness that wasn't well known, but I would've never thought she would have left us that fast. I remember my parents talking about moving our plane tickets we reserved for a week later, to go to France and say our final goodbye.

About four days after arriving in France, we drove for about 30 minutes to this small house where Cecile was kept before her funeral. I felt somehow guilty for not crying about such event, but as I think about it now, it was such an unpleasant surprise and shock that I still had this thing in me that couldn't take it in. We entered the garden and there, I saw my uncles, aunts and cousins waiting in front of the door. Someone came wearing a black suit and opened that door.

“You can come in…” he said in a sad voice.
Right after, my mother whispered into my ear and told me “I don't think you should come. You can wait outside.”

In that moment I wasn't sure what I had to do. Then I thought I had to see her one last time, I mean she was my aunt and I deserved to see her before she left for good.

I followed my family inside and that is when I saw her laying on the bed surrounded by flowers and the flag of Britain gently placed over her legs. My beautiful aunt, who didn't deserve this. I observed her beauty and I couldn’t help myself but to cry. My tears were flowing down my face onto my dark blue dress like a river. I tried to relax and calm myself, but I was angry and sad that I couldn't stop expressing my feeling. I looked over to my two cousins, Anna and Janig who just lost their mother. I couldn't stop but think how painful such event could be to lose a mom. I glance at my mother crying and I felt comfort for having her next to me. I got out of the room to breathe some fresh air I saw my other cousin Jean and I went to hug him. I felt so emotional and started crying again. I remember going back to the room feeling a little stronger.

I came close to her and whispered “Goodbye my beautiful aunt, I love you.”
After about 20 minutes we went to the ceremony, where people sang, and gave speeches about memories they had with her. At the end I questioned my mother and ask her,
“Where are we going to bury her?”
That is when my mother explained to me that Cecile asked to be burned.

We all line up to touch her coffin. Some people were standing in front of he coffin and others waved as they walked by.

Some men carried the coffin to another room where I saw a big oven. I overlooked in the room through a window. The coffin slowly entered the oven, and 30 seconds later, we couldn’t see it anymore. I started to crying again.

After everything was over I felt a regret in me about how I didn't spend time with her. I felt guilty about not visiting her while she was sick.

Accepting someone's death had been really hard for me, but it is the negative aspects of the cycle of life, and we can't change it. However this unforgettable event taught me how family is so important, and how I should spend as much time with them as possible, and cherish the moments we have together.