As a baby, one of the first words I began to understand was the word no. No meant you couldn't do whatever you wanted to just because you wanted to do it. Granted, these "no's" were used for a good reason. If I had not understood or hadn't paid attention to these reprimands, I would not be typing this right now. The warnings and the downright disapproval given to me by my loved ones came out of a place of love. They didn't want to see me hurt myself growing up.
However, as I grew older, "no" became a confusing word. As I enrolled in school and developed in a more social environment, the "no" to behaving a certain way or expressing your thoughts/opinions was not outrightly listed in a book title "How To Be A Commoner". Rather, it was an underlying theme in society. It was there and always there and those who didn't follow the rules were crazy or just those in the gray areas of society everyone seemed to avoid. An innocent example would be my second grade days where the girls would never play with the boys because the boys had cooties. Those strange co-ed kids were casted as weird by everyone including themselves. This exclusive behavior didn't change when I matured, it got worse and still seems to be a problem. I had several "problems" of my own. Apparently it wasn't "cool" to write or read all the time or spend your time watching documentaries when Pretty Little Liars, Vampire Diaries and hmm... Teen Dog? was on. My behavior led to an exclusion and humiliation by the Sugar, Spice and Blaah Group. Now, as I am sure every teen knows, there is always a group that claims the title of being the supreme popular ones. It apparently gives these people the authority to smash everyone else's self-esteem as they walk down the halls of our beloved home or prison called High School. I call them Sugar, Spice and Blaah Group because they sugar-coat their lives or faces with a gilded glamour, know the haughty things or full-of-attitude things to say and all of them seem to have views that make me use the word Blaah because there really isn't any other word to use. At least, not right now. Anyway, the Sugar, Spice and Blaah group can be many groups acting like each other. To all, they set the "standard" of being accepted and loved by society. I am sad to say I aspired to be as popular as them and failed miserably. This aspiration is found among many teens I know. This aspiration pushes teens to stop thinking and formulating their own opinions and follow the ones of Sugar, Spice and Blaah. Sugar, Spice and Blaah, on the other hand, seem more than happy to also insinuate their own opinions where they are not needed. These aspirations and negative opinions act as two walls closing in on teens and crushing the hopes, dreams and ideas right out of them. This environment is the one most if not all teens are placed in. So, what is the solution to keeping self-identity in the halls of development? It's simple and very cliche. Soar above societal expectations and set your own. I can't exactly say, "Be yourself," because soaring above expectations requires your to find yourself. All I'm simply suggesting is to ignore the negativity, take the criticism and find your voice. After all it is people's ideas that make up the notion of society, so you have to find others like you and place yourself among them to start your journey. Using passion as an outlet for dreams helps. I know this sounds like the cheesy books you read at the pharmacy while waiting for your prescription. but seriously, if you want to be happy then maybe you should pave your own path and use your positivity. With all that said, I'm going to read and write some more because I can and I want to and I don't care what you or anyone else thinks.