I sat there on my living room chair in complete silence. I slumped down and let my head fall back so I was staring at the ceiling. I blankly let my swirling thoughts evolve and venture places they never really should have gone. They all spun almost out of control around one central concept. Him. I’m not talking about the God “Him”. I’m talking about my “Him”. He was so great, so perfect, so unattainable, and I was so madly in love with him. I love the way he acts, they way he laughs, the way he talks. I want to be with him every waking moment. The way he makes me feel when he hugs me is like ecstasy. Like I’m floating on clouds. I never want to let go.

I got up and walked out the door. Enough of that. As I walked down the hall and rounded the corner I was surprised to see him standing there. He smiled at me so sweetly. “Hey, what’re you doing here?”

He took my hand. It felt like an electric shock going up my arm into my chest. “I have a surprise for you. Come on, and no asking questions ‘til we get there.”

I gazed at him quizzically and let him lead me out the main door to the sidewalk. We walked in silence for a few moments, him leading me. I savored every moment we were touching each other.

“So how have you been?” He asked over his shoulder.

“Good, I guess. You?”

“Good.” He smiled.

We walked for a while then without an exchange of words. We arrived at the city park. “The park? Why are we-”

“Shh. No questions.”

We ambled down the winding dirt path, trees on either side. I watched him as the dappled sunlight played with his features. I dared to walk ever so slightly closer to him. “Umff.” As my luck would have it I tripped over…what appeared to be nothing, and ran into his side.

He turned and righted me, laughing as he said “Be careful.”

I felt my face blush and I laughed shyly. “Sorry.”

We walked further and further down the path in silence. “Where are we going?” I couldn’t help myself.

“You’ll see.”

The light got faintly darker, and the sun could be seen sinking lower on the horizon. “Its going to get dark soon.”

“Yup.” He twisted his hand in a manner as to lace his fingers between mine. It felt so right.

Finally, just as the sun’s bottom touched the distant tree line, he veered sharply off the path and through the woods. He pushed branches out of my way with his arm and let me pass first, such as the gentleman he is. I came upon an open hillside, a large field with wild grasses swaying in the breeze. Fireflies rose and danced about, lighting their paths with little yellow glowing dots. Above them the sky was set aflame by the setting sun. Red sprawled out and reached for the heavens. It faded to blazing orange that splashed across the clouds. He stood behind me and took in the scenery with me for a moment before whispering, “Isn’t it beautiful?”

I turned my head slightly, not taking my eyes off it and breathed an agreement. I felt his hands on my waist as he guided me into a sitting position on the ground next to him. We watched together as the sun sank lower and lower. Soon the first stars were showing themselves on the edge of the tree line behind us. He leaned over and put his arm around me. My heart leaped into a frenzy. He brushed my hair aside and leaned in until I could feel his breath on my neck. It sent shivers down my spine. His voice was right next to my ear, only a slight whisper.

“I love you.”

The phone rang. I snapped my head up off the chair and glared at it. Rubbing my face with my hand I got up and meandered over to it. “If only.”

I picked it up. “Hello?”

“Meet me at the park.” Came his all too familiar and coveted voice.