The Alternative Love Story

Her light brown hair wandering with the vines.
Her beauty so rare it bewilders the blind.
Her reputation so unobstructed with her intelligent mind.
Beauty, charm, sense combined.

With her head held high, she fearlessly walks.
No worries that could possibly make her cry.
With an evergreen soul that will never die,
She flies through the wind, drifting.
Adventure, experience, confidence no lie.

      Quite a long time ago, I made acquaintances with a unique, young woman. We had bumped into each other on the street on a weekend one day during my morning walk. It was not any different than approaching a stranger on the street but there was something different about this stranger. I knew nothing about this woman, yet as soon I saw her, I knew that she was the type of woman that I aspired to be. As soon as she noticed that she had bumped into me, she said with a calm and gentle voice, one entirely opposite from my own, “I am so sorry for that. I have a lot on my mind so I wasn’t exactly paying attention to where I was going.” For some odd reason, I stared at her in awe. I recognized her. I could tell that she was someone that I unconsciously walked by every once in a while. After I got a chance to return to reality, I answered with a quick “It’s fine!” She then smiled at me and swiftly walked away to a coffee shop nearby. I was speechless.

       For the next few days, the thought of this woman kept pestering its way into my mind. No matter how hard I tried, I failed to realize why I could not stop thinking about her. I met and experienced different people with unique personalities every day, yet none of them shook me the way this woman did. It seemed that I constantly found myself unconsciously lingering on the road with the coffee shop where I had met her. It felt as if the universe wanted me to see her again. There was a strong force dragging me to her and I decided to allow that force to carry me to where I needed to go.

       Everyday, I would spend some time next to the coffee shop hoping to see her again. After a month of waiting, my hope to find her grew less and less until one cold morning. Usually, I would go through the road with the coffee shop on my morning walks but decided that there was no longer hope in finding her so I decided to take a different path. I went through a deserted park that had an old willow tree. I was strolling around the tree when I saw something that stole the breath from my lungs. The coffee shop. There it was again. And there she was. I could not believe my eyes. She looked my way and our eyes met. This was the moment when I knew that I was about to learn and experience something I was never exposed to before.

       After I got the chance to calm down, she explained to me that she felt the same way I was feeling and that she kept finding herself being pulled towards the place we met. We then decided to sit at one of the coffee shop tables to get to know each other. I was determined to figure out why meeting and understanding this woman was significant to my life. Likewise, she was too.

       “Thank you so much,” she said to the waiter as he served us our drinks. A common statement so often said managed to sound capable of silencing the entire universe coming out of her mouth.

       “Sweetie, your child is getting close to the exit. For her own safety, please bring her back to your table so she doesn’t get lost,” she said to the occupied mother sitting nearby. When the mother chose to ignore her, she got up herself and brought the child back to her mother. She was so caring and considerate of other people and chose to value their safety more than her own.

       “I love your necklace,” she said to the sad looking woman walking by. An unexpectedly huge smile lit up the woman’s face. It looked as if the woman was in need of a boost of confidence and had received it. She was able to read people’s faces and knew the exact things to say for only the sake of spreading happiness.

       All the characteristics that were portrayed by this woman were of ones I hoped to acquire someday. She had such compassion in her life and an eternal love for it. No worries or complaints seemed to bother her which is what led to my asking for her help with a conflict I was experiencing.

       Not too long before meeting this woman, I was exposed to a new aspect of my life that confused me. I lost a friend. I had grown apart from several friends previously in my life but this was not any friend; it was my best friend. I knew him for nine years and we had grown up together. We were extremely close and discussed things in our lives that we could never discuss with anyone else. He was my safe haven when I was feeling down and I was his. When together, all our conversations consisted of either deep insights on the world and its aspects or indescribable inside jokes that led to countless hours of laughter. There was no in between. We even believed that our minds were joined in some mutual connection that allowed us to say the exact same thing at the exact same moment. Although we were built on such a strong friendship, time over time, fight after fight, it was over. We were both so destroyed by fighting that neither of us made an effort. We had officially given up on a friendship that was believed to surely last a lifetime. After that, we were entirely distant and walked past each other as if we were never existent in each others lives. No matter how much I attempted to convince myself that I didn't care, It never really worked. I knew very well that there would always be a piece of him in me and a piece of me in him.

       When I discussed this issue with her, her first instinct was to mischievously grin at me.

       “Somebody’s growing up.”

       She said it with such sureness of exactly who I am. It sounded as if she knew me from the day I was born and has been watching my growth. I don’t know why, but it almost felt as if I did know her for my entire life. I then expected her to give me the same advice that I had heard multiple times. The typical, “Some people are just not worth your time,” and “Don’t overthink it. You’re better off without them anyways.” Little did I know that what she was about to tell me would change my view on life forever.

       “Listen, I’m not going to try telling you that he was useless and you need to get over it, because I know he was worth it and moving on would be difficult.”

       “What? You’re not going to tell me the typical pieces of advice that I’ve heard too many times before?”

       “Nope, I’ve been through this before. In fact, I experienced this exact issue. I had a best friend that I loved very much but ended up losing her.”

       “Why?”

       “We were both in a period of time where any small thing would trigger a spark in us. Likewise to your issue, we fought so many times that it reached the point where we were too tired to care anymore. It may seem like this still hurts me and I admit, it does, but if I weren’t to experience this, I would’ve never learned a valuable lesson.”

       “You really don’t regret it happening?

       “Look, I’m only human and there was and will always be a part of me that wished I had never lost her but I knew. I swear to you I knew that I would only come out of it stronger. You learn to admit to yourself that it hurts in order to see the bright side.”

       “I don’t see a bright side.”

       “Oh, but you will. He may have been your safe haven and gave you happiness but true happiness comes from yourself and no one else. It is your job to control your happiness. You, and only you can decide your fate. Oh, and one more thing.”

       “Yeah?”

       “Are you religious? As in do you believe that you’re not alone on this universe?”

       “Yup, I am. I’ve been strengthening my faith a lot lately.”

       “That’s good, so listen. Everything that you need to be going through is written in your life plan. You need to trust that you will get out of this and that it will only make you stronger. Have faith that whatever happens, is meant to happen and accept the fact that you have no control over it. Be strong, Lina. If he is meant to be in your life, he will be.”

       I was entirely speechless. This was when I realized why the universe wanted me to bump into her on the street. This was the lesson I was in need to be taught.

       After this conversation, my entire universe took a turn for the better. Every word that was said in our conversation was taken into deep consideration in my mind and I decided to apply it to my life. It was about time I took responsibility for my own happiness. I made the decision to join a gym since exercising was one of my favorite activities and it would benefit my health. I began to meet new people and began to make new friends. I learned to organize my time, one thing I usually had troubles with before. I spent more time with my sister. I cleaned out my closet and gave clothes to the less fortunate. I made it my goal to help at least one person smile each day. I began to do the things that I loved while being the person I wanted to be. I was finally taking control of my life. Although I knew that there would remain a lit fire deep inside my heart,  I taught myself to live with it and enjoy the rare euphoria that was experienced with this pain.

       “Thank you,” I said to her with genuine gratitude in my eyes.

       “You’re most welcome, my sweet daughter,” she replied.

       Through getting to know this woman and hearing her perspective on aspects in our lives, I realized that she was never a stranger to me. She was a part of my world since the day I was put into it. She was my mother.