As I walk down the cold white eerie hallway of St. Mary’s hospital psychiatric ward my mind is fit to implode. I am guided by two men in white scrubs. One bald, the other with brown wavy hair, neither attractive. It seems as if this hallway never ends. I see all kind of lunatics here. I don’t feel it is disrespectful to call them lunatics as I am one of them, I’m as messed up and crazy as all the residents here, maybe even more we’ll just have to see. I’m taken in to a room and I am put in a bed beside a severely anorexic girl around my age. ‘Dr. Peters will be here to assess you shortly’ the bald man says to me. I attempt to smile and both the men leave. I sit up on my bed uneasily and in my peripheral vision I see the girl is now staring at me.















‘’Hi’ I say awkwardly ‘you have very nice’ I pause and think and I am drawn to her sharp collarbones ‘collarbones’’. S***. Thankfully she laughs and actually seems flattered. ‘Thanks, I’m very proud of them’ Right, shes in the lunatic club get her a jacket. ‘I’m Lizzy, I don’t like eating’ she says with an empty smile ‘I’m Clara, I don’t like life’ probably the most honest sentence I’ve said in two years. ‘Nice to meet you Clara, I assume you’re in for suicidal attempt or depression’ ‘
‘Bit of both’
‘Pills or wrists?’
‘Pills’
‘Nice’
‘Thanks’
I like her, she is very brutal and honest which is very rare in a teenage girl. ‘How long have you had anorexia?’ I ask ‘Three years’ she replies with pride ‘I see you have Dr. Peters, I hate to inform you she talks complete and utter b-------, sees your face as a paycheck. She sees me look worried, ‘Don’t worry’ she continues ‘after a session or two say it’s not working and they’ll refer you to someone else ‘I went through five before I found one I found bearable’
‘Who do you have?’
‘Dr. Mason, he’s got spunk I like him a lot’
‘That’s good, do you thin-‘
I’m interrupted by a tall, old yet attractive woman in a long white coat covering a leather long skirt and a maroon top. ‘Hi Clara, I’m doctor Peters, I hear you’re feeling a bit blue’ Lizzy looks at me with an ‘I told you so face’
‘Why don’t you follow me to my office and we can talk’
And this is where it all starts.