A light gust of wind swirls around me. Fallen leaves lift off the ground and start to soar away, spiraling higher and higher. As I lift my face to follow its spiraling path, I see the sun. Its light blinds me for a moment, and I turn away, feeling bitter. The wind whispers past my ear, as if telling me a secret that only to two of us know. But today, even that doesn’t hearten me. Nothing can raise my spirits.
It’s fall and another year’s coming to an end. Everything is passing by so quickly. It seems as if it was just yesterday that I made my first friend on the first day of school, and now, it’s time to go. When I close my eyes, I remember all the times we laughed together, all the times we fought, even over whimsical arguments. It had seemed like there was nothing in the world that was important other than enjoying the time we had together, playing in the sun, laughing, learning, enjoying. Living everyday to the fullest.
Now everything’s changed. Things are happening as if they are fast forwarded. Each moment seems to last only seconds, actions left undone, things left unsaid. Everything’s moving so quickly, until I feel that even emotions threaten to smother me.
Everyday seems listless. As I walk around my neighborhood, I feel like I’m a stranger in my own body, looking through a pair of eyes, a window, seeing the outside world, and yet, not seeing it. As if every one of my actions is a shadow, and me, a puppet. Nothing seems to be able to lighten my mood. Even my smile seems to be fake; an imitation of what it had been before.
Now I feel so alone. There’s nobody I can talk to, nowhere I can abandon my sorrow. All the pent up anger and grief stays inside me, as if trapped in a closed up room in the mansion of thoughts and emotions that was my brain. I tiptoe around the house, and come upon a book. I start reading and find myself submerged into an artificial world, where feelings easily change and anything can happen. It is only then that I feel normal again, to my regular self, the only time I feel like I’ve been given a reprieve from my loneliness.
Day after day passes. I retreat more and more into the different worlds that reading provides, forgetting my sadness and anger. I become more like normal, my loneliness starting to fade away.
I walk outside around my neighborhood again. The leaves are still swirling in the sky, but now a touch of cold air moves around. Winter is coming. Once again I feel the familiar sensation of the wind near my ear, whispering to me, just like I had nearly a month ago. But now, I hear the sounds the wind is bringing me. Across the street the sound of a car’s horn echoes. Someone has hit the panic key. The old lady across the street gives an irritated sigh. It’s the neighbor down the street again. He never learns how to use his keys. Then I hear the sound of a wind chime. Suddenly out of nowhere, a dog erupts in a frenzy of barks. The pounding of feet alert me and I turn just in time to see a Chocolate Labrador chase a tabby cat around the corner, its owner running desperately behind it, clutching his hat in one hand, and the leash in the other. The sound of laughter catches my attention. A seven year old girl from across the street is talking to her mother, walking their pet. “Can I have a party?” the girl was asking. “Sure,” the mother replied. The little girl turned to hug her mom, a huge smile on her face. The sounds the wind was carrying to me came from all around me. There was so many things to be happy of, so many things that were naturally joyful. Even the sunlight shining on the scenes in front of me seemed abnormally bright. I felt uplifted. There were so many things occurring around me that I had never noticed. Little things like the occasional sadness on a passerby’s face which slowly faded away. The sighing of a disheveled young man who looked like there was too much on his mind, contemplating how much money he had. The annoyance on a drivers face when the car in front of him would not move, even when the light had already turned green. There were so many people who were more unfortunate than me, and others more fortunate. Why should I be feeling so sad?
All of these sounds, images, and feelings seemed as if they were swirled in the wind. As if the scenes, sounds and feelings the wind witnessed were merged into it and carried all around, lifting the hearts of those it passed and taking away the sadness and sorrow of others. The wind seem like it was telling me to look around me and see all the things there were to enjoy, not to be sad anymore. It seemed to whisper in my ear “Don’t be sad anymore. You’re not alone. If you are ever feeling sad, just talk to me.” With that, the wind moved away from me, scattering leaves in all directions. I looked up at the sky, where the sun had just started to shine through the clouds. “Thanks.” I whispered under my breath. My heart felt light once more.