The Bully | Teen Ink

The Bully

March 24, 2023
By Anonymous

It was supposed to be a happy day for the little boy, his birthday party. His mother had put in so much effort to make sure everything was perfect, from the decorations to the cake. Tommy’s mother had spent days preparing for this perfect day. 

Earlier in the day Tommy had lacrosse practice. He practiced with the same kids that were coming to his party. They talked about his party during practice. They were all looking forward to this party. 

When Tommy got home he quickly hopped in the shower and tidied up. He had to look good for this day. He combed his hair super tight to the right and sneaked a little bit of his dads best gel. Even though his dad told him to never touch it, it was a special event so there was an exception. He dressed in his new shirt and khaki bottoms. Tommy slipped on his shoes and was ready for this day. 

He was so excited to have the best party. Everyone started showing up and they all played hopscotch. However, things took a turn for the worse when a bully from school showed up uninvited. Tommy’s excitement soon turned to fear as he watched the bully tear apart the decorations and steal his presents.

The bully had been known to mess with Tommy and his mother had gotten many calls from the school about the bully. The little boy's mother tried to intervene, but the bully was relentless. He continued to make fun of Tommy, calling him names and pushing him around. The other children at the party were too afraid to do anything, so they just watched in silence. Their eyes stared at him in disbelief. The little boy's special day was turning into a nightmare, and he didn't know what to do.

Tommy was shaking in fear as the bully kept ripping everything apart. The bully grabbed everything in sight and destroyed their backyard. Throwing toys at other kids. He grabbed one of Tommys presents which was a toy car. It certainly wasn't a small toy car. He lifted his arm and chucked it with all his might at Tommy’s best friend Jake. It hit him straight in the nose and he was sobbing. Tears streaming from his eyes as he screams in agony. Jake's nose is gushing blood. 

The bully eventually finds the fire pit. The fire had been going for only an hour so it was at its peak. The flames were big and strong. The bully walks over. Tommy’s mom is breathing heavily and thinking what this little boy was capable of. The bully grabs one end of the fire pit and pushes it over with all his might. The ground. The flowers. The grass. The dirt. Everything you can think of catches on fire. Tommy’s dad runs outside and tries to stop the fire. It's too late. It has already reached the house and is spreading rapidly. Tommy’s mom runs and calls the police. Luckily they live 3 minutes from the station. She tries to get a hold of the bully but he is scratching at her. After a couple minutes there are sirens outside their house. Flashing lights. The police and firemen run out of their cars. The police try to get the bully while the firemen put out the fire.

The police finally managed to get the bully to leave but he had many consequences. The damage had been done. Parts of their house had been slightly burned. The little boy was in tears, and his friends didn't know how to comfort him. They all stood there awkwardly not knowing what to do. The atmosphere at the party was somber, and everyone just wanted to go home. The little boy's birthday party had been ruined by a bully, and there was nothing anyone could do about it.

The little boy's mother was heartbroken. She was in tears that night and felt terrible. She had tried so hard to give her son a special day, but it had all been ruined by the bully's cruel actions. She vowed to do everything in her power to make sure the bully was punished for what he had done. She contacted the school and reported the incident, and the bully was suspended for a week. However, the damage had already been done.

The little boy's birthday party may have been ruined, but his mother didn't give up. She organized another party a few days later, inviting only the little boy's closest friends. This time, there were no bullies, and the little boy had the time of his life. They played games, ate food, ran around and just had so much fun. He may never forget what had happened at his first party, but he would always remember how his mother never gave up on him.


The author's comments:

I created this piece for a LA assignment and it was the plot was from Chatgpt but I added more detail. 

The reason I added more details to the story was because the original Chatgpt story was a very good start/short rough draft. It did lack a lot of detail and was a little short. For example there was not a lot of rising action which is an important part because the story just went straight into the climax. It left out parts of the story that I think could have been important such as a more detailed scene of when the bully was relentless, showing examples of what he was doing. The Chatgpt story didn’t elaborate enough and it wasn't a good final draft of a strong detailed story. That is why I decided to edit it and add more detail and just make it a better story.


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