I went from living the life I’ve dreamed about since I could walk to the life I never wished for, all in the matter of a month. My parents went from getting me whatever I wanted to support my future to telling me to figure it out for myself. This is the story of how Xavier was born.

    It was my senior year in high school, I was the star basketball player, and my girlfriend was the head cheerleader. Colleges such as The University of Kansas, Colorado Boulder, North Carolina, and Nebraska Lincoln were a few colleges that were interested in at least one of us. Emily wasn't just the head cheerleader, but she also was very smart and had a lot going for her through academics. She was leaning toward The University of North Carolina, and I was 99% sure that I was going to sign to the University of Kansas. As far as our relationship was going to go we planned on trying to stay together, but we weren’t so sure how that was going to work out. Prior to college and that decision we had a great relationship, or so I thought

    Then one day in February Emily called me and told me we needed to talk, so I headed over to her house. When I got there she was crying and she gave me a huge hug.

“Whats wrong?” I asked, But she just kept crying.

“Whats wrong?!” I asked again.

“Im… Im pregnant,” She stuttered.

    I was speechless. Part of me wanted to just walk out and go home, but I knew I couldn’t do that to her. I didn’t know what to say or do. My stomach felt like it was in my toes.

“I dont know what to do, I’m so sorry Adam,” She cried.

I hugged her and said, “I don’t know what we are going to do either and it’s ok, its my fault too.”

    The first thing we had to figure out was how we were going to tell our parents, and that was not easy. We decided we were going to arrange a dinner with the four of them and drop the news together.

    We decided that we weren’t going to tell anyone until basketball season was over so rumors wouldn’t get started and my coaches didn’t treat me differently. Our parents, on the other hand found, out three days later. I will never forget how I felt that night. I was super nervous and my heart was beating faster than the speed of light. Emily and I acted as if nothing was wrong though and put it off as long as we could. Then Emily took a deep breath and said,

“Mom, Dad, Kylee, Joey.. I, well we have something we need to tell you.”They all looked very confused. “I’m pregnant.. we found out 3 days ago and both decided that you guys needed to be the first ones to know.” Emily said.

    The room was so quiet we could probably hear a pin drop, and we could see the disappointment in their eyes. My mom got up and my dad chased after her. My parents looked at me with disappointment. When I walked back into the other room Emily and her mom were hugging and crying. Her dad and I made really awkward eye contact and I asked if I could talk to him in the other room. Nervously I said “I understand this is the last thing thing you wanted for your daughter, and it was the last thing I wanted for myself. Im going to do all I can to make this work and make sure everything with basketball goes as planned as well. All I ask of you is for you to not be mad at Emily, if your mad at  anyone make sure its me”

He took a minute to respond but then he said,

“Thank you for coming to me and talking to me, it means a lot. Im not happy with you at all, and I’m not very happy with her either. I want you to be there for her as much as you can, but I realize where you are coming from with the basketball. I want this to go as smoothly as possible and I will try my hardest to support you two.”

    The next few months were really rocky. My parents still let me figure out stuff on my own, and  I learned a lot from it. Emily and I were still together but we had a lot to figure out still. I knew one thing and it was that I wasn’t going to give up this scholarship.

“Emily we need to talk,” I said, but she didn't really say anything so I continued.

“I want to stay here and be here for you, but I cannot give up my scholarship. My parents and I have been dreaming about this since I started playing. I know this isn’t fair because you had to give up yours, but this is going to be best for me. I will do whatever I can while I'm gone and whatever it is to keep you in my life.”

    Without responding, Emily got up and left. Then about an hour later my phone started to blow up with text and calls, saying things like “I can't believe you” “You’re going to be a deadbeat dad” and other crucial things along those lines.. Then I got a text that said “We’re done”. I tried to call her multiple times but she didn’t respond. So I went over to her house and she yelled, cried, and argued with me, but she really did end things.

It was a rough three months after that. I planned to leave for Kansas in august and I hoped Emily would understand that I was doing what I thought was best.

    Emily and I got back together before I left. Xavier was born on November 22, 2012. The first season of basketball went amazing and I met a ton of new people. I actually got a lot more playing time than I expected, but sadly during the second to last game I tore my ACL and was out. That was the end of my basketball career. I had never been so sad about something in my entire life, but I figured I had to look at the good in it. I ended up moving back to Colorado and going to a smaller college. Emily, Xavier, and I all got a small apartment together. We both had jobs, and we figured the money situation out and for the most part were financially stable.
    Now Xavier is five years old and just started Kindergarten. Emily and I are very happy and I plan on dropping the big question soon. My parents are very supportive now, and every sunday both of Xaviers grandparents come over. Even though I would have liked to be playing basketball and finish my career, I am happy with my life and look forward to our future.  Everything happens for a reason.