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Comedy Skit
Curtain.
A man is sitting at a desk. He is surrounded by bookshelves and is speaking into a phone.
Mr. Henley: Thank you, Mr. Yantanama, I think our companies are going to do great things together. Okay, you take care now. Okay, bye-bye. (hangs up the phone and sits back in his chair and sighs happily) Ahhh Success. (stands up and walks over to a bookshelf and pulls out a book when his phone rings. He walks over and answers it) Hello, oh he is is he? All right send him in. (hangs up the phone a knock comes at the door.) Come in. (Will Henley enters) Hello Will.
Will: Hello Father, how are you?
Mr. Henley: I would be much better if I hadn't had to just bail you out of jail.
Will: Ah, about that.....
Mr. Henley: How could you Will? Your Mother and I raised you better than this!
Will: Father, I....
Mr. Henley: Why did you do it, Will?
Will: It was wrong Father! I had to protest, just like you did in the 60s!
Mr. Henley: That was different Will!
Will: Why? Because it was you and this was me? Because you were young then and now you're old? Because back then you knew that we had to fight injustice?
Mr. Henley: Because I was protesting racism and you were protesting a dress code.
Will: Dress codes are unconstitutional! They limit free speech!
Mr Henley: Fair point. You have a right to your opinion.
Will: Thank you Father, I knew you'd understand.
Mr. Henley: Yes, of course I understand. This dress code was so restrictive, so illegal that you had to protest. I completely support you. In fact, I am going to call my lawyers and have them file suit against the College, the dean, and the board of governors. We can take this right up to the Supreme Court.
Will: Father, there really isn't any need to....
Mr Henley: No, no, no, Will. We need to fight this. Let's you and I take a look at this heinous dress code and start planning our arguments. (he picks up a paper from his desk) Let's see here, Section one: “No student shall wear clothing with obscene or explicit images and or words.” Shocking shocking.
Will: Father....
Mr. Henley: Section two: “Formal Wear is defined as a jacket, dress shirt, tie, and dress pants for males and a dress or pant suit for females.” I can clearly see how you took offense at that.
Will: Father, please.
Mr Henley: But here's the part that really makes Madison roll in his grave, Section three: “Students are require to wear pants and a shirt when in public.” You're right Will, it's Selma all over again. Shocking, in this day age..... Good for you Will for protesting, I didn't raise my children to sit in the back of the bus!
Will: Father you don't understand!
Mr. Henley: No Will I understand perfectly! You had to protest! And the only reasonable way to protest this law was to have a nude sit-in. This dress code is totally against our founders' wishes! It's like Jefferson wrote “We hold these truths to be self evident that every man has the right to walk around his college campus pant-less.” We need to fight this, Will! (picks up phone) Mrs. Higson, send in my solicitor! (hangs up phone) Don't worry Will, I won't let your expulsion stand.
Timothy(entering): David, I just heard! Don't worry, I will not let your son be persecuted like this! We have decades of precedent on our side, the Supreme Court will rule on our side.
Mr. Henley: You don't think that Scalia will be a problem?
Timothy: no, In fact I think that Alito will be more of a problem.
Mr. Henley: But the other votes are locked up?
Timothy: The four liberals, Roberts, and Kennedy will vote our way, Thomas, Alito and Scalia can be swayed.
Mr. Henley: Interesting, get to to work on it Timothy
Will: Father, please!
Mr. Henley: When will file?
Timothy: Tomorrow morning at nine.
Will: Father.....
Mr. Henley: Good, Good.
Will: FATHER FOR THE LOVE OF GOOD LISTEN TO ME!!!! I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY!!!
(Beat)
Mr. Henley: Well why didn't you say so before? There is no need to raise your voice.
Will: Father, I didn't protest because I thought the law was wrong.
Mr. Henley: WHAT!? You didn't think that a dress code requiring you to wear pants was unduly restrictive?! God, Will! Do I look like an idiot? So why did you have a nude sit in? Dare, hazing?
Will: No, I did it because, because I needed material for a protest song.
Mr. Henley and Timothy: A Protest Song?!
Will: Yeah.
Mr. Henley: What was it called? Nude Train? Imagine No Pants? Naked Class Hero?
Timothy: My underwear is blowing in the wind.
Mr Henley: Nice! (they fist bump)
Will: No, it was called Where have all the clothes gone.
Mr Henley: Gone from nudists everyone.
All: Groan.