I remember the first day I met them, their eyes were wide open, mouths wide open almost forming into a smile, and their eyebrows furrowed. The door had opened weirdly that day, instead of horizontally, it opened towards the sky. And they stood there, waiting for my black burrow to be opened. The first one I saw was the shortest of the three, a girl who was the color of a tree trunk, and her fur, well now I know it’s what’s called a shirt, the color of the sun. “Aww, hi Shera” she awed. Shera, I had heard of the word Hi, but it was usually followed by the word Roy. Roy, the word that I received a treat for acknowledging. She reached out her honey-colored hands and picked me up by the stomach and brought me close to her chest. 

Boom boom boom, her chest screamed. 

After that, it was all sunshine, walks, treats, cuddles, and watching cartoons. I was even there when they moved into a new house, that was a stressful time. Sometimes they would scream and bark at each other, other times they would hug and laugh. I was there for all of it. When the little girl finally started wearing black scrubs and leaving the house early every morning, I was there. 

Everything was awesome until it slowed down.  My paws started to hurt, my spine was always aching. I even started to despise kibble. And then, one day, the girl didn’t wake up early, didn’t shower, didn’t dress up in black scrubs, didn’t come to say goodbye before opening the front door. Instead, she woke up early, with red glossy eyes and a runny snout. She opened her bedroom door and walked up the stairs, straight to my bed at the end of the hallway. “Hi Shera,” she bent down and comforted me. Then, salty water fell from her eyes, and I gathered the courage to lift my head and lick the salt off of her face. Instead of pushing me off, like she always did, she smiled and kissed me on my head. Mom and Dad came outside of their rooms too, mom held a book in her hands. I was too tired to figure out what they were doing as they stood in front of me and mom chanted something. I felt the fur on my head become wet, but this time I didn’t have the energy to get up to clean it off. 

Afterward, I was taken on a ride, that’s all I remember. Well, all I remember before I got here. I woke up in a dark alley, the brick around me was wet, the floor was shiny, and reflected the moon in the puddles. I looked around me and then towards the end of the alleyway, suddenly, a blue light crossed the sidewalk. What was that? I leaped off of the ground and ran towards the street to get a better look. It was a dog, I recognized that dog. He looks just like this dog that was accompanied by a man in an all-blue outfit once when mom’s car had been hit by a neighbor. I remember how tense she got, and I remember that dog. He looked so egotistical then like he was better than me. Had a hat on and everything, psh. He looked different, no hat, no clothes, and he was-he was glowing. 

“HEY,” I called out running to him. “WAIT UP, I remember you!” He didn’t stop or wait. Finally catching up to him, I got a closer look at his face. Yikes, a huge scar right across his eye. 

“What do you want, kid?” he groaned while walking. 

“Kid? My name’s Shera” he scoffed at my response. “Do you remember meeting me? You had come to my house once, my mom tried to give you treats, remember? You were with that big guy wearing all blue- he didn’t let you have any,” I remembered in a sullen tone. 

“Went to plenty of houses in my day, Shera, now leave me alone” we passed by numerous, but empty shops. 

The sound of silence emphasized the hiss of the wind and the rumbling of the sky. Feeling the knot in my stomach get tighter, I finally got to the point, “Where are we? I was at my doctor’s office, and then I ended up here, I want my family.” He stopped in his tracks. Suddenly, his brown and black ears drooped, and eyes softened. 

“Kid, this is the waiting land,” He responded.
“Waiting? Waiting for what-” I questioned. 

“To go to the good place,” he elaborated. 

“What’s the good place?” I felt myself getting more confused by the second. 

“Alright, sit” He sighed, “the good place is where you go after you have lived your life with your family, well- only if you’ve been a good boy. The good place is filled with treats, walks, and if you're lucky- one day your family. While someone decides when we get to the good place- if we get to go, we wait here.” 

“Who’s deciding?” I wondered. 

“We don’t know, one day, you’ll go to sleep, and just end up there, happens all the time. I had a buddy, Rex. We both went to sleep near a bench at the local park one day. When I woke up, he wasn’t there, or anywhere. Listen, you just gotta wait it out,” he explained. 

“So, we’re dead? Is that why you’re glowing?” I asked. 

“It ain’t just me, look at your paws,” he laughed. I squealed and jumped in shock as I looked down and my usually white paws now glowed a bright blue. “Alright, it’s getting real late. If I were you, I’d find a dry spot somewhere and get some rest. Let the storm pass,” he suggested as he got up and walked away. I should probably explore, I thought, I can’t remember the last time I was off of my leash for this long outside. 

I continued walking on the streets for a while. All the shops looked dark, only a few were lit up by neon red and blue signs. Occasionally, I would pass by some trees, and some shrugs, that looked almost blue in the moonlight. This place is so weird, I don’t even smell anything. It’s like it exists, but doesn’t. Ugh, I miss the smell of mom’s yummy cooking- sometimes she would even let me have some of it. Those were the good days. As I walked a bit further, I spotted a dry spot on the ground. I looked up to find that it was shielded by the protruding roof of a shop with a picture of huge scissors on it. Better get comfy I suppose.

As I layed down, I couldn’t help, but let my thoughts wander and question my situation. Seems kinda pointless, just waiting. This can’t be it, can it? I remembered, one time I was in the car with my family. The girl was driving and the display on the dashboard had stopped working. She was so confused and I could feel the frustration and anger radiating from her. Finally, mom, who sat right next to her, suggested that she pull over somewhere and ask for directions. We found a girl walking, and stopped right next to her. “Go a bit straight and turn left at the red lights,” she had insisted. 

“Didn’t we go that way? I feel like we made a full circle,” mom said after we drove off. I remember they were so frustrated that they had put up the windows too, so I couldn’t even enjoy the ride. 

“Well, she’s a local, she knows better,” the girl said. The girl- the girl- what was her name again? 

Mom pressed further, “just ask someone else, for my sake.” So, she did. She pulled up next to a man, a very fat man wearing a red tracksuit. He looked like a fire hydrant. 

“Left? Oh gosh no!” he exclaimed, “make a right, and keep going straight til the stop sign, and then make a left.” And so we did, and finally arrived at the beautiful lake, filled with all sorts of scents. 

“See,” mom grinned, “it's always better to get a second opinion.” And with that memory, I jumped on all fours. Mom’s right, I must find someone else to talk to. I must find my fat man. I headed towards the center of the town. “Hello! Anyone there?” I yelled repetitively. 

After some time, as I passed by a landfill of garbage, a voice replied “SHUT UP! SOME OF US WANT TO SLEEP!” Startled, I hesitantly turned towards the landfill and saw the silhouette of a sleeping dog against a mountain of trash. 

“Hi, my name’s Shera, I’m sorry for disturbing you, I’m just looking for some assistance,” I explained. As I got closer, the silhouette became smaller and smaller, until I realized that it wasn’t a dog… It was a cat. I jumped back at the discovery. 

“Ha, what? You think only dogs wait to go to the good place?” she sarcastically acknowledged my reaction, “It’s late, watcha want?” I stayed quiet. The only time I ever saw a cat was when they had made little houses in our shed in the backyard. They were mean cats, and huge too. “Listen here, noise machine, I want to sleep, you need assistance. Now, I don’t see anyone else around to help you. So why don’t you put aside your predisposed biases, and let me give you a hand, so I don’t ever have to speak to you again,” she offered.

“I’m- I’m sorry. I was just wondering if you knew anything about how to get to the good place. I met a dog, he had a huge scar on his face. He told me, that I was just supposed to wait,” I clarified, 

“Psh, the German,” she replied, “he doesn’t know a single thing. He thinks you’re supposed to wait because that’s what he wants to believe.” She got up and started to stretch, she even did the downward doggy pose that mom did. Well, maybe it’s the downward cat pose. “Everyone’s got their own journey to the good place. You gotta ask yourself, what is it that you most want? And then you have to complete or make amends with that, only then will you get to the good place. That German, he can’t make amends with what he wants. His owner and him were killed trying to stop an armed robbery at a bank. He was a police dog y'know,” she sighed. 

“What do I want? I just want my family” I thought out loud. The cat walked slyly into the light, bringing her bright ocean eyes in front of me that seemed brighter than any blue against her black fur. 

“Not what you want like that,” she explained, “it’s got to be deeper. You love your family, clearly. What is it that you want from them?” she questioned. 

I never really wanted anything from my family, I thought. I guess I wanted treats, sometimes, and other times I wanted rubs. But, none of that stuff really mattered, as long as I was with them. As long as- “happiness,” I whispered. Raising my voice, I emphasized, “I just want them to be happy.” The cat raised her eyebrows and squinted her eyelids. 

“You’re a fast one. Hell, I’ve been down here for years and I still can’t figure mine out” she laughed. “Well, then. There’s a bus that comes every morning to pick up anyone who knows where they want to go. I never got on it cause, well I don’t have a clue on my purpose. But, if I were you, I’d get on the one tomorrow morning. Before you forget, of course.”

“Forget?” I asked. She turned to look at me, and paused. The eye contact sent shivers down my spine all the way to my tail. 

“The longer you’re down here, the more you forget about your past life. Then, the harder it becomes to figure out and carry out your purpose,” she explained. So that’s why I couldn't remember the girl’s name. “Whatever you gotta do,” she continued, “you better hurry.” She moved away from the light coming from the building sign above and slowly walked back into the darkness. 

That night, I didn’t sleep at all. Terrified that I would miss the bus, I stayed up and in the center of the town, drenched in cold rainwater and surrounded by flashing red and blue lights. However, the thought of my family kept me warm in the heart, and to me, that was enough. Surely enough, as the sun rose, the screeching noise of tires startled me. A big yellow bus with “ANYWHERE” printed on the side of it pulled up right in front of me. The bus doors opened towards me and made a swoosh sound. Inside, behind the wheel, sat a furry little creature. It almost looked like a rat, but cuter…not as dirty. Its fur was light brown and white, too unusual to be a rat’s fur. It’s also too fat to be a rat, I decided.  

“Where to?” he squealed at me. 

“My family,” I replied. The bus ride was, well I actually don’t know how long it was. As soon as I stepped paw inside the rather empty bus, a strong sense of tiredness overwhelmed me. I went to the first corner I saw and layed down. When I opened my eyes again, I discovered that I was laying in front of a small beige house with a red roof. It was on a street with houses of similar style and different colors. My house. I went around the front, straight to the back of the house. I always used the back door. It was closed. I lifted my paw up to scratch at the brown wood door as I often did in the past. This time, something weird happened. My paw disappeared into the door. Curious, I put my snout to the door, it also disappeared. I kept edging forward until I was inside. 

The sweet aroma of tomatoes and meatballs hit my face. Mom used to always make that when- when- I better hurry, my brain’s getting weak already. I looked to my left, the door to mom’s room was open. I ran inside to find dad and her sitting on the bed. 

“WOOF! WOOF!” I barked. They didn’t turn towards me like they usually do. They can’t hear me, that’s right. I felt my chest tighten, and my eyes become fuzzy. This feeling is worse than the feeling of when they used to leave for work without me. They sat there looking at the TV screen, blankly, and I sat there looking at them. Suddenly, dad faced downwards. He’s looking at me- HE’S LOOKING AT ME. 

“WOOF!” I barked- wait, no I didn’t. Swiftly, a small golden puppy ran beside me, towards dad’s legs. 

“Hi, buddy! How are ya?” dad smiled. They replaced me. I felt my legs becoming weak. What am I supposed to do now, I wondered while staring at mom and dad exchanging looks of happiness while holding the puppy. They adore him. They’ve already moved on and I’m stuck. I’m stuck. How will I ever make it to the good place? I couldn’t bear watching the golden ball of fur live the life that was once mine. I turned my back towards all three of them and headed down the white hallway to the back door. As I walked, I passed by a painting of me, a painting that the girl made. The brush strokes captured my hair so accurately and the background was a bright green, just like our- their backyard. She even put my favorite toy in there. The bright red dinosaur with a fluffy spine. As I began to move along after admiring the piece, I heard mom’s voice tense up behind me. 

“Simmi,” she began. Simmi, that’s right. Simmi, how could I forget? Hearing that name alone used to make me jump with joy. My ears automatically rose up to hear the rest of the sentence. She continued, “she’s still in her room. She hasn’t even named him yet. I really want to help her heal, but she won't if she doesn’t accept him.” I turned my head around to see dad nodding in agreement. 

“It’s hard. Shera was her first dog, she grew up with him. It’ll be hard, but life has a funny way of helping us heal from the wounds of our past. Once she realizes this little guy isn’t so different from Shera, she’ll come around,” he replied. So my whole family isn’t happy? I’d be lying if I said that knowing she was sad made me feel sad. In fact, it took away the burning feeling growing inside of me. I must go see Simmi, I miss her. 

I ran down the hallway and then down the red-carpeted stairs into Simmi’s room. There she was, sitting in the middle of her bed. Her sheets were always gray and she was wrapped in her favorite fuzzy white blanket. Her face looked red, and her eyes puffy. She held something in her hand. A picture frame. I leaped onto the bed, and sat right beside her. I wish I could touch her, but every time I moved my paw towards her, it just went right through her. She sobbed and sobbed, making the picture in her hand drown. It was a picture of her holding me as a young pup at my first training session. I’m literally wearing a diaper in that, so embarrassing. She couldn’t have chosen a different picture to stare at?
“I miss you, Shera,” she cried. The words felt like needles. I can’t take this, I’ve got to do something, anything, to make her happy. I got up and leaped off of the bed, almost slipping on the smooth wooden floor. As I made my way back to mom’s room, I passed by the painting again. Dad’s words rang in my ear as I stared at the background of the piece, “Once she realizes this little guy isn’t so different from Shera, she’ll come around.” I’ve got to do something that makes her associate the golden puppy with me. Whew, that’s gonna be hard, that little thing looked nowhere as cute as I am. My eyes abruptly moved to the red spot in the painting. The dinosaur…it was the first toy she ever got me. Where did I put that thing? I hid it somewhere. Oh god, brain, this is not the time to be forgetting stuff. Is it in one of the closets? No, mom would’ve found it and took it out. I hid it- dug it- BACKYARD. 

As my eyes widened at the realization, I saw a sliver of gold in my peripheral vision. I turned my head to find the pup, staring at me. “Can you see me?” I called out. It lifted its right paw and tried to touch my snout with it. God, it’s too young to even speak. 

Creeeak, the back door whispered. Mom stood by waiting for the pup to come. It must be his time to relieve himself, this is my chance. I walked out to the backyard and the pup followed me. Okay, I remember I put it away from the shed because I was afraid that the cats would break in again and steal it. I couldn’t have put it right in front of the deck… that would be too obvious. That leaves, right across the shed, the furthest corner. YES, I remember- I remember, that’s where I put it. I turned around to make sure that I still had the pup’s attention and then ran towards the beautiful grass and mom’s favorite white flowers to get to the corner. When I arrived, I began to swipe my paws on the ground, but nothing happened. He must do it. I looked at the pup and then back at the ground. I must’ve done this about ten times before I realized that I would have better luck getting a rock to dig instead. When I was young, if anything smelled good I would follow it relentlessly, I remembered. So I put my snout to the ground and watched the golden blob in my peripheral vision come closer and closer. 

In no time, he was digging lively with his tiny paws. The brown soon turned into red, and he snatched the dirty toy with his mouth. It’s almost bigger than him. Wasting no time I ran back inside the house and straight down the stairs while he followed me, extremely slowly. He does have short legs, I’ll let him off the hook this time. We stopped when we got to the side of Simmi’s bed. I heard her sniff, and then look down at the pup right next to me. 

Her eyes softened, and her nose became a darker shade of red, almost like the dinosaur. “Where did you get that?” she asked the pup. As her eyes became watery, her lips widened and her hands reached out to grab the golden pup. “Thank you,” she whispered. 

No burning inside this time. Her happiness made me happy. I’ll always be her first and I’ll always be her Shera. It’s time for her to be happy, and time for me to retire, I laughingly realized. Suddenly, a wave of sleepiness stroked me. I went to the only place I could think of. The end of the hallway upstairs, where I spent my last day sleeping. I settled down into the corner and let myself doze off. I wonder if the good place will have a copy of my dinosaur toy, I hope so.